It can be hard for a parent to decide on the best way to deal with their child.It can be more difficult when the child is not normal.Discipline is more than just punishing a child for bad behavior, but modifying it into something more constructive.
Step 1: Don't forget that a child with an intellectual disability is also a kid.
Every child has quirks, behaviors, and reactions.There are things a child does and things they don't like.Being on the spectrum doesn't change this.Discipline techniques should approach difficult situations with understanding.Provide your child with the support they need to control themselves and turn "naughty" behavior into more constructive actions.Some kids behave badly.They have trouble controlling themselves when they're upset.It's important to understand and teach them how to behave better.Remember to be fair.It's not right to punish a child for acting "autistic" like stimming or avoiding eye contact, or for breaking rules that other kids can get away with.
Step 2: Be patient.
It is important to remember that patience is key when trying to understand your child's behavior.With time, your child will learn how to behave better.This isn't going to happen overnight.Special needs children experience extra challenges.Sensory issues, communication difficulties, strong emotions, and other issues can be very frustrating to handle.The listening body language of non-autistic children may look the same as that of autistic children.Stimming, looking in other directions, and not responding doesn't necessarily mean that they're not listening.
Step 3: Stay focused.
Encouraging and praise should be the focus of discipline.Your job is to praise them as they learn how to behave well.If your techniques don't seem to be working, try talking to a therapist.
Step 4: It's important to handle meltdowns with care.
A lot of what you might think of as bad behavior in children with special needs comes in the form of meltdowns.It can be difficult to react to younger children who don't use verbal communication to express their feelings.What may look like a bad behavior tantrum can actually be an attempt to express their needs, deal with sensory experiences, or handle stress.To help teach the child to avoid meltdowns, you want to create a plan.If the child is upset further and the sense of control they have over their decisions is lost, things can get worse.If a child is taught to take a break and use self-calming techniques, they will be able to manage their time and emotions.More detailed advice on helping reduce and manage meltdowns can be found in our articles on How to Deal with Autistic Children's Meltdowns.
Step 5: A calm voice and demeanor is needed.
Children can be frightened and confused by power struggles.Children acting out by crying, screaming, shouting, or self injuring can be caused by anxiety.The goal is to keep the child calm.Even if you're frustrated, keep a low voice.You can buy yourself time.Say, "I'm really frustrated."I need some time to think about what I'm going to do.
Step 6: A predictable routine and structure is needed.
When a child with special needs can make sense of the world, they feel more secure.Place activities where they occur.This can help the child stay calm.It is easier to narrow down why the child is acting out.If they cry when you ask them to do homework after school, it might be that school tires them out too much and they need to relax first, or that homework is a source of major stress for them.
Step 7: To create order, use picture schedules.
A picture schedule shows which activity the child will do next.Parents can use picture schedules to help guide their children through different activities during the day.It helps improve structure in a child's life because they have difficulty keeping an overview of their daily activities.You and your child can keep track of tasks by ticking off completed activities.If this helps the child, you and your child can keep a clock or light-up timer near the activities to determine the time frame for each activity.Your child will feel more connected to the images if you help them design and draw them.If your child wants to refer to the images whenever they please, keep them in a book or on a board.
Step 8: Consistency with the schedule is important.
The child feels secure.If a change needs to be made, give the child warning and an explanation.A consistent system can be created by working together with other caretakers.
Step 9: As your child grows, adjust the schedule in small ways.
While the schedule should be relatively consistent, this does not mean there is no room for your child to grow as an individual, as they make their natural progression in development and growth.Once your child learns to shower independently, bath time may turn into shower time.Changes can be made to fix issues.If you schedule exercise time after lunch, and the child gets a stomachache during exercise, it might be that they need time for the food to settle.Discuss the schedule issue with the child and come up with ways to rearrange things, like exercising before eating or having 30 minutes of free time in between.
Step 10: There should be lots of time for your child to relax.
It's important for children with special needs to get enough down time.When your child feels like there is too much going on, down time is important.This is indicative of the need for down time when your child becomes distressed or upset because of this over-stimulation.Take your child to a quiet place and allow them to relax under the supervision of an adult.It's a good idea to plan relaxation time after activities.If the child comes home from school stressed or tired, they should have at least half an hour to relax.You can offer casual supervision if the child is old enough.While you read a book or do something on your phone, the child could rock back and forth and draw pictures in a corner.
Step 11: Schedule a lot of time for fun.
Like other children, Autistic children need time to play and enjoy activities of their own choosing.Stress can be a problem for kids on the spectrum.The child can stay happy and balanced with self-directed play.The child's idea of fun might be different from yours.A noisy party can cause stress for a child with special needs.lining up toys or walking in circles is an enjoyable way to spend time.Even if you don't understand it, it's still fun if the child likes it.Even if the child is told to play, being bossed around by an adult doesn't count as fun.The child should take the lead if you play with them.
Step 12: If the child has a lot of energy, plan some outlets.
Some kids can't do the same thing for a long time.Make sure to schedule plenty of time for your child to blow off steam and use some of their excess energy if this is the case.It is good for active kids to play sports and play outside.If you see the child getting restless, you can announce breaks.You could say, "I can see you're having a hard time focusing."Let's run around for 15 minutes.
Step 13: Take care of any sleep or medical problems.
It would be natural for your child to express their distress if they are not getting enough sleep or are sick.If you notice behavior that is focused on a certain area, you can have a doctor check that area.A boy who hits his head might be suffering from a problem.Something is wrong if you hit a body part.
Step 14: You should be a good example.
Children look at adult role models to understand how to behave.Even when you don't know the child is watching, show good behavior.
Step 15: It's important to give your child plenty of attention.
Kids may act out if they feel neglected.It is possible to reduce the chances of this happening by making sure that they get positive attention.If you think the child is looking for attention, teach them how to be assertive.They should be taught phrases like "I want attention" or "Will you hang out with me?"When they say this, reward this behavior by paying attention.Asking for attention is more effective than acting out.
Step 16: Discuss ways to handle emotions with the child.
Kids may not know how to deal with their feelings.Some kids with special needs may need more guidance.Talk about people.You can ask questions like "What do you think he should have done to handle his anger, instead of yelling?"
Step 17: If you can tell that a child is struggling, remove them from the situation.
Get the child out of the situation if you can tell that they are reaching their boiling point.You could suggest that they leave, or you could assign them a solitary task that is enjoyable for them.They can take time to calm down.You look stressed.You should go to your corner for a while.We can finish your homework in half an hour.It's a nice day.Are you going to get the mail for me?The dog isn't walking yet.Will you walk him?I think we might be low on toilet paper.Will you count the rolls in the bathroom?You can write things down with this post-it and pencil.You are getting frustrated.Come back to this after a 10 minute break.Sound good?
Step 18: Try to get the child to calm down.
Sometimes restless kids can lead to less-than-ideal behavior."Are you bored?" is one of the things you could say.Do you want to draw pictures with me?There are 3 more aisles in the store.Will you count them with me?I can tell you have a lot of energy.I'm going to run!I bet you can't catch me!
Step 19: Don't put too much pressure on the small things.
The kids on the spectrum are going to be quirky.Like adults, all kids have bad moods and bad days.It's not necessary to turn every instance of unusual or imperfect behavior into a battle.Make peace with things that aren't perfect.
Step 20: Make sure your expectations are realistic.
A child with a delayed development will be slower to learn certain things.It's possible that something else is getting in their way, or that your expectations are too high.Talk about the issue.The child.Why do you think chores are hard for you?Other caregivers include your child, teachers, and therapists.
Step 21: Praise the child for good behavior.
Praise the child when they do well.This makes the child feel proud of themselves and eager to keep doing what they're doing.Praise can be a motivator.Try to praise something at least twice a day.Say thanks for putting your toys away quickly.I'm very impressed.Good job being gentle with your baby brother!You are a good big sister.I would like to thank you for listening to me.That was cool.You are studying very hard!That is a sign of a good student.You were assertive with me today, I'm proud of you.
Step 22: Good behavior has positive consequences.
The child learns why the behavior matters.You can explain a reward that is linked to good behavior.Your floor is a good place to play when you pick up your toys.Everyone can move around easily in your room, and it's a fun place to hang out.She likes spending time with you when you're gentle with the dog.She will come to you more often if you treat her gently.When you listen to me for the first time, it makes me happy.It means I don't have to think of a punishment for you because you listen to me.I enjoy it when that happens.It's easy for your brother to study when you use your inside voice.People like having a quiet house.It's nice for all of us.
Step 23: If needed, calm the child first.
If the child is acting upset, calm them down.Discipline can be given if they are clear-headed enough to listen to you.Don't give up on a child.Explain that it is counter productive.I can't understand you when you shout.You can use your inside voice to tell me why you're upset.Patiently remind the child to use self-calming strategies, such as taking deep breaths and counting.Offer to use the strategies together.If you can't honor their requests, try to let them know that you care.If you are willing to listen and empathise, children can calm down quickly.
Step 24: When you see a child acting out, remind them.
Little kids have limited memory and impulse control.Sometimes they might forget to follow the rules.A reminder may be enough to correct them.Tell them what you expect them to do."Walking feet, please" is more helpful than "No running" because it encourages the child to visualize good behavior."Slow down so you don't slip and fall."Please, inside voices, please.A woman is trying to read.Please be assertive.I can't help you if you tell me what's wrong.You can show me or talk to me.It's up to you.If you want to be restless, you can grab a toy."Be gentle with the cat."
Step 25: If they don't listen to your reminder, give them a warning.
If the child refuses to correct their behavior after you remind them, warn them that there will be consequences.They have a chance to stop and follow the rules.You need to be gentle.I will take the toy away if you don't stop.I'm going to count to 3.Your hands need to be out of her hair by 3.Inside voices are important.I will turn off the TV if you can't watch quietly.There are video games after your homework.There will be no video games if you don't do your homework.
Step 26: If they don't change their behavior, give them consequences.
You may need to follow through with a punishment if a reminder and warning don't work.The consequences should be administered right away.Waiting can make it less effective.The child won't connect the punishment to the behavior if you wait too long.It's better to let it go this time.If your child learns through visual tactics, you can create a series of pictures that explain how bad behavior and good behavior lead to rewards.Your child will understand the relationship between discipline and misbehavior if you do this.
Step 27: The punishment should be tailored to the violation.
Do not rely on a single punishment.Minor misbehavior should only result in a warning, while major misbehavior might need a more serious punishment.Determine what works best for the child.Give them a chance to correct themselves.You don't need to punish them if they listen.If the child throws their toys, they must pick them up or lose access to them for a few minutes.No TV time is a loss of rewards.This may cause too much distress to be effective, so make sure that this does not interfere with their special interests.
Step 28: Stay on top of it.
The child needs to be aware that bad behavior will have consequences, and that it won't change based on who is supervising them.Every time, give the same punishment.Apply the same rules to everyone in the family.You might have to punish yourself if you break a family rule.
Step 29: Penalties that cause physical pain should be avoided.
It is okay for a child to become violent when they are upset.If you are angry with your child, use the same self-calming strategies that you would like them to use.The child is encouraged to mimic you when angry or frustrated.Research shows that spanking can cause a child to act out more and listen to you less.It can lead to mental health problems, impaired cognitive development, and worse relationship skills later on.There are more effective ways to make life easier for both parent and child.
Step 30: Don't criticize the child's behavior.
The child should not be labeled as bad or wrong.Point out the wrong behavior to the child in a positive way.Say to them, "I can see you're really upset about that."It won't help if you yell.Do you want to do some deep breathing with me?Why did you fall down?It's never okay to hit other people.If you're angry, use your words, tell an adult, or take a break.Next time, you need to do better.Let's discuss this.
Step 31: There is a reward system that relates to good behavior.
Similar to punishment, your child needs to be aware of the fact that they will receive a reward for their good behavior.This can help discipline a child.
Step 32: From time to time, use activities as rewards.
The child loves to do things.When your child behaves well or stops doing a bad habit, you can suggest these rewards.When applied correctly, this may initially sound like a bribe.The reward system should not be used to stop bad behavior but to reward good behavior.Use this technique lightly.I'm really proud of how you handled yourself in that noisy store.We have some time to ourselves this afternoon.Would you like to read picture books with me?
Step 33: You should be open to new ideas about disciplining and rewarding your child.
Each child is different.The ultimate reward for a child with an intellectual disability is what may be considered a punishment.It is important to be open to new ideas about punishment and reward in the area of discipline.Discipline should always be thought about before being implemented.Would you do the same thing to a non-autistic child?Discipline practice may do more harm than good if not.
Step 34: A reward system is needed.
Two of the top reward systems include the creation of a behavior chart in which good behavior is rewarded with a sticker or mark on the chart.The child gets a reward if they get enough marks on the chart.Allow your child to place the sticker.A lot of the systems that are implemented are token reward systems.Good behavior is rewarded with a token.The rewards can be changed at a later time.This system can be difficult to implement for younger children because it is often designed through a contract with the child.
Step 35: You should praise your child.
When rewarding your child, speak in a quiet tone.Being loud can upset them.Praise the effort as oppose to the outcome.They were praised for working towards achieving a goal.Recognising your child's persistence and efforts is more valuable than the result.Add a small reward if your child doesn't understand what you're saying.The frequency of your child's correct behaviours increases when you show sincerity and delight.
Step 36: Provide your child with sensory rewards.
A reward that also promotes sensory activity is a great reward.This may upset your child, so be careful not to overstimulate them.The child likes to look at something.A new library book, a water fountain, animals, or a model airplane can be found.The sound is calm and soothing.The person is singing a song or playing a piano.This reward is more than just eating.An assortment of sweet fruits, something salty and any variety of something which your child views as pleasurable are included in the tasting.You can have different smells for your child to distinguish.Sand, ball pit, water, food packaging are some of the things that can be touched.chip packet, bubble wrap, or play dough.
Step 37: Moderate your rewards system.
There can be misuse of rewards.Access to the child's favorite things shouldn't be dependent on their behavior.Even if the child is having a bad day, they should be able to get their favorite stuffed animal.Special bonuses should be the rewards.Don't give food as a reward.As the child grows up, this can lead to bad habits.The child's internal motivation can be affected by the over use of physical rewards.Don't turn the child's life into a series of exchanges.They should like being good for themselves.Praise and phase out physical rewards as the child gets older.
Step 38: There are children who think concretely.
You need to be careful how you speak to them because they often take things literally.You have to understand why your child is acting out before you can discipline them.Discipline them in a way that actually reinforces bad behavior if you don't understand the cause.If you don't know why your child is acting out at night, you may want to put her in time out.If the child's goal is to put off going to bed for as long as possible, a time out could be rewarding.She will get to stay up later if you discipline her without understanding the cause.Sometimes children act out because they don't know how to handle stress.Loud music hurts their ears.It's best to remove the stressor, discuss communication strategies, and not punish.
Step 39: Understand why your child is doing something.
A bad behavior is actually serving a purpose.By understanding your child's purpose, you can figure out how to prevent unwanted behavior and replace it with more appropriate actions.Your child may want to avoid a situation so they can act out.They might be trying to get attention or something else.It can be hard to tell which goal your child is trying to achieve.Children don't understand how to handle stress when they act out without a goal.Sensory issues, hunger, sleepiness, not enough down time, etc.It is possible that the cause of this is.
Step 40: What is causing the bad behavior?
One key clue to figure out which child is avoiding a situation or seeking attention is if your child frequently misbehaves.It is possible that the child is seeking more attention because they are acting unusual for an activity they enjoy.When it is time for a bath, your child may act out.If she does this before or during bath time, you can conclude that she is acting badly because she doesn't want to take a bath.