Is your middle school relationship not working out?The way to end it kindly is to have as little pain on either side as possible.
Step 1: Is it the best idea to break up?
A lot of thought needs to be put into this decision.If you break up with them, you will look foolish if you decide to go back to them.If your boyfriend ditches you for his friends, if you like someone else, or if he texts you all the time but won't talk to you in person, it's time for the relationship to end.If he's been frustrating this week, then maybe you should hold on a little longer and see if it improves.
Step 2: Think it through.
You can't go back if you make the decision.Unless you sense that it is turning into an abusive relationship, try to think about it for at least a week before you break up.You need to tell someone and get help.If you're close to your friends and they know a lot about your relationship, ask them for help.
Step 3: It's good to observe some common courtesy.
You should never break up with someone before their birthday, as they may have bought an expensive present.
Step 4: Stick with it if you decide on a date.
Step 5: As you approach the date, slowly slope off answering calls and texts.
You don't want him to think you made a mistake.
Step 6: If he has any, start asking for it back.
Ask for an item or two at a time.Unless you are in a long-distance relationship, you will be able to get the rest back after you break up.Ask your boyfriend if he will mail your items back when you break up.
Step 7: You should only talk to people you trust if you're going to ask for advice on how to break up.
They will spread the word that you're planning to break up, so don't ask anyone that's not trustworthy.Ask trusted friends.Don't talk to a lot of people.A good number is three.
Step 8: Don't give him the cold shoulder.
He might dump you before you can break up with him.
Step 9: Unless you are in a long-distance relationship, you should break up in person.
You can break up over the phone if you're in a long-distance relationship.Don't break up over text message or social media.Change your Facebook status to "single" and wait for them to find out is the worst way to do it.
Step 10: Don't do it at school.
It's possible to do it in a public place, like a park, where you can say what you need to say and then text an adult to pick you up.Don't make it seem like a date.It's just getting his hopes up.
Step 11: Don't start the conversation with "I need to talk to you" or " I think I might want to break up with you."
It suggests that you're willing to talk about it."I need to tell you something" is more definitive and final because you're telling him your decision and not allowing yourself to be talked out of it.It won't be a discussion or a debate.
Step 12: Don't be complicated.
If you want to break up with him, tell him in your own words."Our relationship isn't working anymore" is an acceptable line.
Step 13: If he asks, give him reasons.
You can tell him he's not right for you if you don't feel for him anymore.If you have a reason, such as he texts you all the time but ignores you in school, or he makes you sad with things he says, tell him gently.Don't act like it's a joy to bring up his weaknesses in the relationship.
Step 14: You don't need to comfort him.
No matter how harsh that sounds, the relationship is over and his feelings are not your responsibility anymore.If you've made mistakes in the relationship, say it wasn't his fault that it ended.Don't make him feel like he should be comforting you.It isn't his responsibility to comfort you.
Step 15: Unless you and he are breaking up amicably, do not suggest that you remain friends.
It's not a good idea until a few months have passed and you've blown off some steam.
Step 16: Don't apologize, but tell him you hope he understands.
You have nothing to be sorry for.
Step 17: Don't interrupt the conversation.
Say what you need to say and then walk away.It will cause hard feelings if you talk for an hour about what an awful boyfriend he was.
Step 18: When he is awake and home, call him.
Step 19: You are lucky if it goes to voicemail.
You can tell him what he needs to hear.
Step 20: Let him know that you need to tell him something.
Step 21: Tell him why you're breaking up with him.
Step 22: It is not your responsibility to comfort him very much.
It's okay to say mildly comforting things.
Step 23: When you're done, hang up.
Step 24: Forget about him for a while.
Enjoy time with family and friends.The focus should be on school.Pick up a hobby.Ignore his calls and texts as they may be asking to get back together.Block his number if his calls are overwhelming.
Step 25: Ask him for the items he still has if you didn't ask for them before you broke up.
He should be able to give them to you.
Step 26: If someone asks, tell them the truth.
"We decided together that our relationship wasn't working" is a lie, and he's not going to appreciate it.Tell people, "I broke up with him," and end it there.
Step 27: Some will be unfriendliness.
You're going to get stares from his friends.Ignore them.If there are threats, report them to the principal.
Step 28: Expect a feeling of loss.
It's normal to miss your ex after a break-up.If you agree that you are both ready, you can't go back to him.
Step 29: If you're interested, look for someone else.
It's okay if you're not.You have a long life ahead of you.