It can be hard to plan a wedding when your parents don't like you.How can you interact without being aggressive?There are ways to deal with your parents not liking you.Work with your future spouse to address your parents concerns.Try to reconcile the situation or figure out the best ways to keep the peace.
Step 1: What are your parents' concerns?
You should ask your parents why they dislike you.You can take steps to address their concerns once you know what they are.You could say, for example, that you don't care for my fiancée very much.I am not sure why.You could say to them, "Could you tell me why you don't like my fiancée?"
Step 2: You should talk to your parents on your own.
It might be easier for you to overcome your parents dislike for your fiancée without their presence.Your parents may be more willing to speak freely if you use this method.You don't have to tell your fiancée that you're going to talk to your parents about why they dislike you.Listen carefully and calmly to what your parents have to say, as I think it will be best if we bring you into the discussion a little later.Find out if the problem is finances, prospects, attitude, background, beliefs, or any other factors.
Step 3: Discuss the situation with a group.
After you have spoken to your parents alone, or if you prefer, right from the start, sit down with them and discuss the situation.It is possible to bring a peaceful and happy resolution to the situation with open and honest communication between you and your parents.Talk at a neutral place like a restaurant or a park.You may be less upset in a public place.If you tell your parents that you will sit down and talk about the situation so that they can work it out, be firm in your insistence that your marriage plans will not be derailed.
Step 4: Relax your parents.
There are times when parents worry about their child's happiness because of their future in-laws.Let your parents know that they have nothing to worry about when you talk to them about your decision.It can help alleviate some of their worries and make them like you a bit more.You can say, "You guys raised me well and I hope you can trust that I've thought this decision through."You could say, "I know that you want the best for me, and I know I'm making the right choice."I am sure that your feelings will change if you give my fiancé a chance.
Step 5: Stay neutral.
Don't get involved in any arguments between your parents and your fiancée.This will make one side feel betrayed and may make the situation worse.The best way to diffuse the situation is to remain neutral and let both sides know that you care about them.You could say, "I know that there are difficult feelings on both sides."Don't let yourself get dragged into an "It's them or me" ultimatum, keep saying "I love each of you deeply and I know we can work this out, or at least learn to tolerate one another."
Step 6: Tell everyone the truth.
You might be tempted to tell your fiancée that your parents like them.You might not want to let your parents know that you are getting married.Honesty is the best thing to do when your parents don't like you.You might have to tell your fiancée that your parents don't care for you very much.I hope that will change some as they get to know you.The truth will come out eventually, so it's best to address problems before they get worse.
Step 7: If you can, try to compromise.
Your parents and your fiancée may never see eye-to-eye.They can reach a compromise that is acceptable to everyone.If you want to be a family without being negative, you need to sit down with your parents and your fiancé.You might say to your parents, "I know you may never fully embrace Jamie."We need to sit down and work out a way to manage our problems together, because we are going to all be a family soon.
Step 8: You should clearly state your position.
You need to stand firm if you have tried compromising with your parents and they will never be able to embrace you.They won't change how you feel about your partner or your plans for a life together.Say something like, "This is my decision to make and your disapproval will not change it."I am sorry you can't accept the person I love, but I will always love you as well.
Step 9: As necessary, adjust your wedding plans.
When you dreamed of your wedding day, it probably didn't include your parents.Don't expect everyone to be happy on the big day.Make adjustments to your wedding plans to account for the absence of your parents.If you have a civil ceremony because you don't share your religious background with your parents, do not try to force them to come.Tell them that the ceremony is at 2 o'clock.If you decide to come, I will make sure there are seats for you and me.I hope you do that.
Step 10: There is a plan for managing family interactions.
You will have to deal with the difficult relationship between your spouse and your parents after you are married.Honesty, open communication, and practical adjustments are key.When necessary, clear the air, seek out compromises, and be reasonable about limiting interactions.It's a good idea to be clear that the two of you can only stay a certain amount of time at a family gathering.If things go bad quickly, you should have an exit strategy in place.
Step 11: Talk to each other.
Don't try to ignore the problems caused by your parents dislike for your fiancé.Use it to strengthen your relationship with your partner.Seek support and solutions from each other and communicate openly and often about your feelings and concerns.I've been feeling down about my parents' refusal to accept you.Can we talk about it and see if we can come up with some ideas?
Step 12: Empathize with your partner.
The negative attitude of your parents will affect you and your partner.They are likely to be guilty of causing this break between you and your parents.Make it clear to your fiancée that you support and love them just the way they are.If your partner is stressed, sad, or feels guilty about the issue, be aware of the signals you are putting out.Do you blame yourself even if you keep saying it isn't your fault?Listen and talk honestly.
Step 13: Consider couples' counseling.
There are seeds of doubt or distrust that can be sown by family disapproval.If you want your marriage to succeed, don't be afraid to seek out professional help in dealing with the problems caused by your parents dislike for your fiancée.Being determined to make a relationship work is a sign of strength and not weakness.It is possible to reduce the stress caused by your parents disapproval by talking to a therapist.Doing things together like exercising, meditating, trying yoga or taking up relaxing hobbies can help reduce stress.If the therapist decides to include your parents in a session, they will use their judgement.An outsider can connect better with parents in this situation.