How To Deal when an Ex Dates a Friend

Breakups can be difficult.It is worse when your friends decide to date.Feelings of jealousy, self-consciousness, sadness, and anger are common in an emotionally-charged situation.It's important to talk to your friend and resolve your emotions so that you can maintain the friendship without feeling sad or uncomfortable.

Step 1: Discuss your feelings with your friend.

Explain to your friend that you are working to get through it, even if it is sad.You might be distant until you can get over your feelings.It hurt my feelings when I found out you and Jen were dating.It made me feel sad, but I am working on feeling better about it.Before jumping to conclusions, hear what they have to say.

Step 2: Tell your friend what you know.

You can tell your friend how you feel.It's okay to tell them that you wish you'd had a heads up about the relationship.If you feel betrayed, make sure that your friend knows, but don't lose your cool.An honest conversation will make you feel better and give you a better idea of where you stand.If your friend doesn't take the conversation well, keep your cool by regulating your breathing and paying close attention to what they say.I wish that you and Maron would have told me that I was thinking about dating so I could prepare myself.I'm not over him.

Step 3: Ask your friend not to talk about the relationship.

It's best to avoid conversations about your ex if they give you negative emotions.If possible, speak to your friend and ask them not to talk about their new relationship.This could make you feel better about the situation.It's possible to say something like, "Conversations about Jen make me feel awkward."It might be a sign that you're over the relationship if you don't get emotional when talking about them.You can say something like "remember when I said I didn't want to talk about John?" if you get over the past relationship.If you want to talk about him, I don't mind.Take some time away from your friend to heal.You just need a little time and distance to heal and process your feelings, so let your friend know that you still value their friendship.

Step 4: Tell your friend that they are not allowed to date your ex.

Your friend's feelings could be hurt if you tell them that they aren't allowed to date your ex.It makes it harder for your friend and ex to find happiness.The relationship isn't meant to hurt your feelings, so try to keep your jealousy under control.If you give your friend an ultimatum, there is a chance they will choose your ex over you.

Step 5: Don't badmouth your ex.

If you discover that your friend is dating your ex, you might want to ruin the relationship.This could damage your relationship with your friend.Before sharing any information about your ex with a friend, think carefully.Do you think sharing this information will make a difference?

Step 6: Allow yourself to be angry or sad.

Allow yourself to cry or scream into a pillow if you want to.You can prolong the time you feel sad or angry by avoiding negative feelings.Allowing yourself to feel the emotions from the break up will allow you to get over it quicker.If you are still upset about the situation, don't say things like "I do not care" or "It does not matter".Don't lean into the feelings.You don't want to do things just to get back at your ex.

Step 7: List the reasons why you and your ex broke up.

Looking at the relationship from the outside can give you clarity.Think about why you broke up with your ex.It is possible that the relationship would have been bad for both of you if you weren't compatible.Even if you didn't want to break up with them, there's a good chance that you were not compatible.It's okay to express your concern about your friend because of previous experiences with your ex.It doesn't look like you're bashing your ex if you keep to the facts.Constant fighting, belittling, volatility, manipulation, and jealousy are some of the signs of an unhappy relationship.You might not be in the same place as your ex.

Step 8: It's a good idea to get rid of things that remind you of your ex.

It may be more difficult to get over your ex if you have items from the relationship.If you want to distance yourself from sentimental things, get rid of them.This will help you maintain your friendship.It's a good idea to throw away things that remind you of your ex.

Step 9: Don't follow your ex on social media.

You should not follow them or block their content because you will see pictures of them.It's a bad idea to follow what your ex and friend are doing online.It's possible to get over the break up by disassociating yourself from that imagery.If your friend posts photos of a relationship that makes you angry or sad, you may have to stop following them.If it makes you feel better, you can block your ex.

Step 10: It's a good idea to take a break from seeing your friend.

You should stop calling, texting, and asking to hang out with your friend.If you need to see them every day because you go to the same school or job, you should have a conversation with them so that they aren't confused as to why you stopped hanging out.If you're not in the new relationship, you may not get jealous or angry.It's best to avoid both of them until you feel better about them.You can say, "I really tried getting over it, but it still makes me feel uncomfortable."I need a break from hanging out with you because I still want the best for you.If your friend is rubbing the new relationship in your face or being toxic, it may be best to cut ties permanently.

Step 11: Your friend's new relationship is not about you.

It is okay for you to have your own opinions about your friend's relationship with your ex.Remember that your friend and your ex are not the same person and that their relationships are of their own.You would expect your friend to respect your boundaries.It is not a competition to compare yourself to your friend.

Step 12: Be the best person you can be.

You aren't defined by your relationships.Taking time to build your strengths can help you move forward.It can help you gain a better understanding of who you are as a person, independent of other people in your life.It is possible to take a class in a subject you have always wanted to learn more about, or work towards a personal fitness goal.

Step 13: Take your mind off the situation by hanging out with your friends.

You can meet new friends by hanging out with other friends and putting yourself in social situations.When you're upset, having friends around for support can make you feel better.If you need to talk to someone else about the situation, you could explain it to your other friend.If you want to avoid unnecessary drama, hang out with someone who doesn't know your ex.

Step 14: It's a good idea to take a break with an activity or hobby.

You don't have to worry about the situation if you think about what you like to do.Doing something you love will keep you occupied at the task at hand and could distract you from the fact that your friend is dating your ex.Playing an instrument, participating in a sport, playing video games, or reading books are pastimes.If there aren't any hobbies that you like to do, consider taking a course.

Step 15: Treat yourself to something that makes you happy.

Think of something that will bring you joy, like a trip to the beach, or a relaxing spa day, and treat yourself.It is possible to spend time with other friends who are supportive.It is possible to keep your mind off of the situation if you do positive things for yourself.It is possible to give additional insight or clarity to the situation by doing something relaxing.

Step 16: When you are ready, rekindle your friendship.

When you are no longer upset about your friend dating your ex, reach out to them.It's possible that you can build a relationship with your ex so that things are not awkward in group settings.If you haven't been in a while, call or text your friend and ask to hang out.Explain that you're ready to move on and talk about why you felt bad.Don't badmouth your ex in front of your friend if you hang out again.I know it's been awhile, but do you want to hang out?I am missing you!