How To Decide if You Should Have Kids when You Have Depression
It can be difficult to decide whether or not to have kids.It can be difficult to make a decision if you have depression.It is possible that you will be unable to meet your child's emotional needs if you pass the illness along to them.While many people with depression become excellent parents, there are some extra factors you should take into account.If you decide to have children, you should carefully consider the risks and rewards, as well as the steps you can take to stay healthy.
Step 1: If you have a family history of mental illness, consider it.
Depression can have a strong genetic component.The risk of someone developing depression is two to three times that of the average person.People with close relatives who have had multiple periods of depression have a higher risk.Depression isn't always handed down from parents to children, but it does happen frequently.The risk only applies to children.Adopted children are not at risk for catching depression from a parent, though they may suffer if bonding is disrupted or they model the behaviors of a depressed parent.
Step 2: You can talk to your doctor or a counselor.
There are no two cases of depression the same.Your doctor or a mental health professional can help you decide if having children is a good idea for you.While a doctor can tell you about your risk of passing on depression to a child, what is currently known is based on just a few genetic markers.A doctor can tell you if it's safe to take medications while you're pregnant and also refer you to a counselor for emotional support.
Step 3: Babies in the womb can be affected by antidepressants.
The unborn baby is affected by any medications you take.Birth defects, low birth weight, and damage to the lungs are some of the harms caused by antidepressants.When women decide to have a child, they stop taking their antidepressants.Would you be able to go for nine months without taking your medication?
Step 4: You can learn about the risk of depression.
More than 10% of new moms experience depression after giving birth, which is a serious form of depression.Postpartum depression is more likely to be developed by women who have a history of depression.In the weeks or months after giving birth, depression can cause feelings of despair, anger, and emptiness.Many mothers with depression feel unable to bond with their baby or struggle with intrusive thoughts about hurting themselves or the baby.Post- birth depression can persist for years without treatment.Therapy may be better than medication according to studies.
Step 5: Understand the emotional demands of raising a child.
Babies and toddlers need a lot of attention and love.It can be hard for depressed parents to give their children the love and discipline they need.Do you feel prepared to care for a child emotionally, not just physically?Children with absent parents may have problems.
Step 6: You can live a fulfilled life if you don't have children.
There is no difference in happiness between people with and without children.It won't doom you to a meaningless or lonely life if you decide to stay child free for medical or personal reasons.Families in some cultures place a lot of importance on having children.If you feel pressured, remember that what works for one person won't work for another.There are many good reasons to have children, but doing it to make someone else happy is not one of them.Being child-free does not mean you are selfish.Not having children is a responsible choice.Child-free people can contribute to the world in many ways.A recent study shows that parents are more likely to be depressed than their child-free counterparts.People without kids were found to be happier than other people.
Step 7: Children can be affected by a father's depression.
A lot of research focuses on the impact of a depressed mother on her children.The mental well-being of a child is influenced by the father's Depression.Men with a tendency to act out in anger are different from depressed mothers who may have trouble bonding with their children.Children living with one or both parents who are suffering from depression are more likely to develop anxiety or depression themselves.These children have trouble socializing at school, perform poorly in academics, and are more likely to engage in risk-taking activities.The mental health of your partner is just as important as that of the woman you are planning to have a baby with.
Step 8: Take into account the stability of your relationship with your partner.
Research shows that a supportive spouse or partner can buffer the effects of a depressed father.It is less likely that a father's depression will have a negative impact on his children if he feels listened to and supported.It's vital that you and your partner work on the health of your relationship in order to counteract the effects of depression on your children.It's great if you feel supported by your partner.It is possible to attend couples therapy before you decide to have children.
Step 9: You can learn how to deal with a depressed partner.
Since emotional stability within the parental relationship is essential to raising healthy kids, it's important for partners of the depressed to learn how to recognize signs of an oncoming depression and plan accordingly.If you notice that your partner is withdrawing, sad, or making remarks about suicide, immediately seek professional help to minimize the effects on your marriage or partnership.You can get support from family and friends if you call your partner's doctor or therapist.If one or both parents are prone to bouts of depression, you should have a plan in place.Write down the best way to deal with them and avoid them.When your partner is depressed, you need to take care of yourself so that you can continue parenting when he or she is incapable.Deep breathing or meditation can be used to manage stress.Get plenty of rest and eat a good diet.Everyone in your household can be positively impacted by a healthy lifestyle.
Step 10: Would you regret never having children?
Some people want to have so many children that they run the risk of becoming depressed if they don't.If you want children and think you would be unhappy if you never had any, starting a family may be the right choice for you.Adoption carries no risk of passing on depression genes, if you are concerned about having biological children for medical reasons.Think about your partner's wishes when making this decision.Your partner is committed to having children even though you are depressed.Do you want to make your partner happy by managing depression and parenting?Is your partner willing to take on more parenting responsibilities when you are depressed?
Step 11: Some people's depression goes down after they have children.
Some parents say it is easier to manage their depression after their children are born.Some parents focus less on their own moods when they know the physical and emotional needs of their children.Some people experience a sense of purpose in raising their children.When you are around kids, your playful side may come through more easily.Everyone is different when it comes to having kids.It is not a good idea to have a baby in hopes of curing your depression.If you really want children, you should know that they won't make your depression worse.
Step 12: No children are born in ideal circumstances.
There are no perfect parents or a perfect upbringing.Financial hardship, illness in the family, or personal difficulties with school or friends are some of the issues that children face.It is not ideal for a child to have a parent with depression, but no other circumstance would be better.
Step 13: Depressive genes may have benefits as well.
Increased emotional awareness and better memory may be provided by the same genes that are linked to conditions like depression, anxiety, and addiction.Creative expression is correlated with mood disorders.Children who are raised in stable, healthy homes may experience these benefits without developing mental health problems.
Step 14: A plan can be developed by consulting your doctor.
It is important to make a health plan before you become pregnant if you have had depression in the past.It's possible that you need to take precautions for a healthy baby.Your doctor could refer you to a counselor or tell you about lifestyle changes you need to make to have a baby.
Step 15: Talk to your partner.
If you are depressed, make sure you and your partner are on the same page about how your health may affect your plans to have children.Tell them about your needs and concerns.It is possible to raise well-adjusted, emotionally healthy kids with the help of a supportive and committed partner.Let your partner know if you start to feel depressed.You can get help from them.If you are single, identify some family members or close friends you can turn to for emotional support.If you can afford it, you should consider hiring household help during your pregnancies.
Step 16: There are warning signs of a relapse.
Depression can be hiding when it comes back.It could be a red flag if you find yourself feeling sad or tired more often than usual, snapping at the people close to you, or not enjoying your favorite activities anymore.If your symptoms last more than a few days, see a doctor or counselor.
Step 17: If you are pregnant, think about taking medication.
There are a number of serious health risks to babies in the womb.Depression and anxiety can be dangerous to an unborn baby, as well as to you.Discuss the safest option for you and your baby with your doctor.Birth defects, miscarriages, and cognitive problems can be caused by some antidepressants.Miscarriages, as well as low birth weight, premature birth, and lifelong changes to a child's brain structure can all be caused by mental health problems.
Step 18: Before, during, and after the baby is born, see a counselor.
It can be difficult for parents with good health to have a baby.The challenge is greater for parents with depression.A counselor or therapist can help you deal with the emotions of being pregnant and having a baby.Depression and parenting support groups can be useful.