When your child does things you don't agree with it can be frustrating.Teenagers are going through a lot of physical and emotional changes.It can be hard to make sure that you and your teen are on the page.It is possible that it is necessary to discipline your child.There are many things you can do to make sure your discipline is effective.
Step 1: Make your expectations clear.
Good communication is a key to having a positive relationship with your teen.You have to be able to communicate with one another.Discipline your teen less frequently if you are able to communicate effectively.A clear explanation of your expectations is an important component of good communication.Let your teen know what you expect.Maybe you are trying to help them succeed in school.Let your teen know which grades you like.Maybe you want them to get all the A's.Explain to your teen that you will help him or her meet their expectations.Explain to your son or daughter that you need them to study at least X amount of hours per week if you are focused on better grades.They should have homework done before they hang out with their friends.Expectations can be set for non-tangible outcomes.Maybe your teen has an attitude problem.They should speak respectfully to everyone in the family.It's possible to put your expectations in writing.The words you are saying will be reinforced with this.
Step 2: Ask questions
As a teen, your child is spending more and more time away from home.School days are longer, there are more activities to join, and more friends to hang out with.It is important that you know what is happening in your teen's life.You need to ask questions in order to do that.There are questions that require more than a "yes" or "no" answer.You will get more descriptive answers.Did you finish your homework?What have you been working on in English class?It's a good idea to set aside time each day to talk to your son or daughter.It is a good idea to ask questions to see how they are doing.You could ask, "How are you feeling about the soccer game on Saturday?"
Step 3: Actively listen.
It's a great way to strengthen your relationship with your teen.Asking questions isn't enough.You have to listen to what they are saying.There are many things you can do to improve your listening skills.Try to remember what your teen says.You could say, "I'm hearing that you're frustrated that your friends have later curfews than you."It helps clarify any issues if you show that you are engaged in the conversation.Give feedback.It is a good idea to give your initial feelings on a topic when you are talking to your teen.You can say, "I'm not against giving you a bigger allowance."We need to talk about an increase in responsibilities.Allow validation.You should acknowledge your teen's feelings.I am aware that you are sad that your dad moved out.That is understandable.
Step 4: You should choose the right time.
Communication with your teen can be difficult if they are not in the mood to talk.If you need to have a discussion with them, try to choose a good time.Don't wait until the last minute as he or she is going to school.It is a good idea to talk while you are doing an activity.It's a good time to check in with them while you're cooking dinner.Pick a different time for your conversation if your teen is resistant to talking.It should be constructive for both of you.Try to be patient.Teens will only open up when they feel like it.Don't brush them off when the moment comes, be ready to listen.
Step 5: Promote accountability.
It is necessary to discipline your teen when communication breaks down.You should think about what works best for your family when disciplining your child.Discipline can be achieved by holding your child accountable for all of their actions.Your teen knows what behaviors you expect from them if you have clearly laid out your expectations.Let them know that they must be held responsible if he or she is disrespectful.It is not okay to swear at your younger brother.You know that it leads to the loss of a privilege.It is clear that she is accountable for her actions if you focus on your child's actions and knowledge.
Step 6: Avoid being punished.
There is a difference between disciplining and punishing teens.Discipline can be constructive and the term "punishment" is negative.Discipline is a way of helping someone stick to the rules, whereas punishment is more of an act of revenge.Explain that by disciplining your teen, you are teaching her the benefits of adhering to guidelines and consequences.You can say that you are providing good training because the world works that way.At times, you will have to place restrictions on your teen, but you can do so without offending anyone.Avoid ultimatums.Don't say "Get better grades or else!" because teens see ultimatums as a direct challenge and a path to punishment.Don't threaten vague punishments.Tell your teen that you will impose the restrictions you agreed upon.Be flexible.Maybe you told your son or daughter that they can't see their friends for two weeks because of their low grades.Lifting the restrictions a few days early will show you appreciate their actions, if they come home with several "A" papers or quizzes.Discipline is reasonable if you show it.Be respectful but stern.Don't speak to your teen like a young child.Don't be sarcastic or mock.
Step 7: The boundaries should be set.
Let your teen know what actions are not acceptable in your home.It's important to clearly define the boundaries so that they know what they're allowed to do.Make it clear that they need to avoid alcohol.It is possible to set boundaries regarding your teen's social life.They can only stay out until a certain time.If you need them to check in with you throughout the night, make that clear.Let them know that you will be watching their online activities.It's okay to let your son or daughter know that you will be checking in on them periodically to make sure that they are safe, even though teens should enjoy some degree of privacy.Setting boundaries for the relationship is important if you allow your teen to date.Explain to your son or daughter that they can't be in their bedroom with their boyfriend or girlfriend because the door is closed.Don't just disagree with your teen's choice of boyfriend or girlfriend because they look like a criminal or are quirky, for example.First impressions aren't everything, but if your teen's boyfriend or girlfriend is controlling or making inappropriate gestures, then it might be a good idea to talk to them about your concerns.To help teach responsibility to your teen, explain that boundaries are for their safety.
Step 8: You should give your child agency.
It can seem like your teen is struggling.Teens are trying to establish more independence and control.Allow your teenager to be involved in setting boundaries.They will be more invested in the process if they have agency.Make a list of guidelines for your teen to follow.You can set curfew, car privileges, or expected grades.Don't be afraid to negotiate.They will be more likely to listen to you if you respect their opinions.Discuss a consequence with your teen.Have them tell you what they feel is an appropriate action if they come home late one Saturday night.When a teen is given more responsibility, they behave in a more mature way.
Step 9: Take a look at the situation.
It's important to remember that your teen is dealing with a lot at times.Mood swings can be caused by hormones and body chemistry.They may be dealing with pressures from school or their friends as they try to more fully develop their identity.It's important to consider the context when disciplining a teen.Have they been rude recently?Try to figure out if something is bothering them.Have you noticed their best friend isn't as frequent?Try to cut them a little slack when they are stressed out.Is their grades slipping?Take a few days to observe their habits.Teens need a lot of sleep, so maybe you can help them get more rest.All components of the situation should be considered before making a decision on discipline.
Step 10: Use your feelings.
Being sensitive to what someone else is feeling or thinking is called being empathetic.Place yourself in their shoes when disciplining your teen.Take their emotions into account when making a decision.Try to think about what your son or daughter is feeling when they don't get to go on a road trip with their friends.They might be suffering from fear of missing out or being teased.You can offer compassion even though you don't need to back down on the rules.I think you're frustrated that you won't be going with your friends.Is there anything else you and I can do this weekend?
Step 11: Ask for advice.
It can be hard to deal with a teen.You might feel overwhelmed.Don't hesitate to ask for help.You may have a trusted family member who can give you advice on how to relate to your teen.Talk to other parents.It is helpful to know what your son or daughter's friends are allowed to do.It is possible to ask their parents about curfew, allowance, etc.To get an idea of the policies you want to put in place.Your teen's doctor can be a great resource.They can make sure that your son or daughter stays healthy.They can offer up outside resources at regular check ups.