Marriage requires attention and care because it is a dynamic bond between two people.Over time, initial passions and feelings can fade if they aren't cultivated, especially in the face of stress caused by financial issues, professional demands, or raising a child.Don't give up hope if your marriage is in trouble.There are many ways to remind each other why you fell in love in the first place.
Step 1: Write down how you are feeling.
You won't be able to know what's wrong in your marriage until you speak with your partner.How you feel should be the first thing you identify.Write down the feeling.It is possible to attribute the feeling to a pattern of interacting.You can refer to this list when you are ready to talk.
Step 2: Work on what you can fix.
Trying to change someone's behavior will likely be met with resistance.Work towards becoming a better person yourself by focusing on your own issues.Improving yourself can help improve your marriage.If you communicate the changes you will make to your partner, you can be on the same page.Changing someone else's behavior is more difficult than changing your own.Drop negative behaviors and replace them with calm and constructive responses.Carefully and honestly examine any personal problems that may be affecting your marriage and work to address them.
Step 3: It's time to improve your marriage.
Lack of commitment is one of the most common reasons for divorce.Being dedicated to making your marriage work can help make your bond stronger.You can both work towards building and strengthening if you maintain a sense of we.Don't forget good times, focus on those aspects.Discuss your dreams with one another.Both partners should commit to each other.
Step 4: Consider seeing a marriage counselor.
If you are unsure of how or what you can do to improve your marriage, but are dedicated to the cause, you should see a marriage counselor.They can help you find what issues need addressing and how to approach them.Marriage counselors are available to help.If both partners agree to it, you should be able to see one.Marriage counselors can be found by searching for couples therapy.Marriage counseling is done by a licensed therapist.Marriage counseling can be done only with one of the partners present.
Step 5: Speak in a constructive way.
It can be tempting to say things that are not nice.Pick what you want to say and make it constructive.If you aren't using your message to hurt your partner, you can still speak your mind and express yourself.Ask for input if you want to use "I" statements.Say something like "What do you think about..."Speak your mind in a calm and fair manner.
Step 6: Don't shout.
A discussion might turn into a shouting competition when things get too emotional.Yelling at one another will hurt the relationship.When trying to improve your marriage, it is advisable to avoid loud outbursts.Yelling won't convey any useful message.You can feel emotions.They can't become angry during a discussion.
Step 7: Together, make decisions.
One person trying to make all the decisions in a relationship can make the other party feel inferior.Choices that involve both people should.When discussing any plans, try to keep both your own and your spouse's needs in mind.There are options that are best for both partners.Don't try to force a choice.Cooperative decisions should not be competitive.
Step 8: Actively listen.
Active listening can help your spouse feel heard when she is talking to you.You will be able to fully engage in a conversation with your spouse if you carefully listen to what she is saying and give her signals that you are paying attention to.Restate what your spouse has said."I just want to make sure I understood what you said..."Validate what is being said with encouragers like "oh", "I see" or "mmhmm".I'm glad you brought it up.Allow for quiet time.When your spouse is done speaking, don't jump in.
Step 9: Don't be passive- aggressive.
When you act nicely to a person, you may feel resentful and work to undermine her.Passive aggressive behavior can be caused by being afraid of direct conflict or expressing one's feelings.Reducing the harm that it can cause to your marriage can be done by avoiding passive aggressive behavior.Try to find out what causes you to act passive- aggressive.Practice being honest with your feelings.Being passive-aggressive is a form of lying.It's perfectly normal and healthy to have disagreements.
Step 10: It's a bad idea to be competitive.
Competition is a part of life, but your marriage is not one of them.If you find yourself or your spouse trying to turn everything into a contest, work to stop it.Discussion and argument should aim to solve problems, not win them.Being too competitive can be caused by being insecure.Improve self esteem to avoid competitive behavior.The winner in a marriage should be both partners.You should support your spouse instead of competing against her.
Step 11: Stay positive.
It is possible to keep a positive outlook and help a relationship.You can find things that you love about your partner.Don't be afraid to show your appreciation.Keeping your focus on the good can help increase your mood as well as the mood of the marriage.Things you do for your spouse will make her happy.Enjoy doing something nice for her and don't expect anything in return.Doing something generous can make you feel more generous.Your actions are stable and genuine if you keep positive over a period of time.
Step 12: It's time to stop negative thinking.
Negative feelings and responses will be increased by dwelling on negative issues.You are likely making things worse by holding onto negative aspects of your partner.Don't dwell on the negative thoughts that you may have been holding.There will be more anger, resentment, and blame.It is possible to get a clearer picture of what you can improve by letting negative thinking go.