You probably have been lied to at some point in your life.It can be difficult to confront someone who is lying if you think they are lying.It is possible to get a liar to be honest and open up to you.
Step 1: In an individual setting, liars are more likely to tell the truth.
Pick a spot where they feel comfortable, and don't call them out in front of other people.You can meet up at your home or public park to have a conversation.Depending on what the lie is about, you might not want others to hear it.Send them a text if you can't meet them in person.
Step 2: When you look into their eyes, they are less likely to lie to you.
If you are talking in person, make eye contact with them as much as possible.It is a good sign that they are not telling the truth.A liar might cross their arms, shrug their shoulders, or turn their entire body away from you.
Step 3: It will put the liar at ease.
When you catch someone in a lie, yelling at them probably won't help you lose your cool.If you can, try to stay calm and collected.If you just realized someone was lying, give yourself a few minutes to calm down.
Step 4: Talk about it with a question.
If you think they lied about where they were yesterday, you could ask, "So, how was your doctor's appointment?" or "You saw Jake yesterday?"The important part of this is that you don't sound like you know it's a lie.They could put their guard up again.If you are texting this person, you can start by saying "Hey" and then ask your questions.
Step 5: They can't answer with "yes" or "no"
The more they talk, the more flustered they are.You could ask, "I'm a little confused by that."Stick to neutral statements that don't indicate you know they're lying.
Step 6: They have trouble with details that they didn't prepare.
If someone is talking about hanging out with a friend in the afternoon, you might ask, "What'd you guys have for lunch?" this will throw them off and make them shift their story a bit.If you think they lied about who they were with, you might ask how Jessica is.If you think they are lying, you might ask, "Did you walk there, or did you take the bus?"
Step 7: You should notice the things that don't add up when you listen to them.
They may clarify something that doesn't make sense.The liar is more likely to tell the truth if these are pointed out.You might say, "Oh, you got there at 11?"I thought you said they didn't show up until late afternoon.You said she was out of town this weekend.
Step 8: Lying makes them put their guard up.
If you come at them like this, they are going to keep telling you you are wrong.If you are dealing with someone who lies all the time, this is especially true.Compulsive liars can even lie to themselves.The phrase "Is there any reason why?" sounds more like a request for information than an accusation.You could say, "Could you explain..."
Step 9: It is one of the best ways to get a liar to lie.
Pull out the proof you have and show it to them.Let them do the talking until they tell you the truth.Maybe you have photos or videos of them that they claim not to be.Maybe you have text messages showing they were outside of the relationship.
Step 10: If you understand their reason, they might admit the lie sooner.
They might be more likely to admit that they were lying if you tell them that it is okay.Say something like, "Are you lying to me because you thought I would be angry?" or "Did you make that up so I wouldn't find out and break up with you?"
Step 11: Let them know that telling the truth is the best option.
Even if it took a while, praise them for finally telling you.You have the ability to decide what to do about the lie and what they were lying about.You could say thank you for telling me the truth.I would appreciate it if you were honest with me in the future.