It can be painful to approach someone you have a crush on if they reject you.Many people think that a crush's rejection is comparable to a relationship already happening.How you handle that rejection is important.Learning how to get over a rejected crush can help you pick up the pieces of your love life and move on.
Step 1: Resist getting angry.
When your crush rejects you, it's normal to be upset and a little sad, but anger won't help.If your crush is a close friend, getting angry can ruin the friendship.Try to smile and wish your crush good luck.If you're a close friend, let your crush know you want to stay friends, and that you hope this won't change things between you.It is the best way to save face after being rejected.
Step 2: Spend time with friends.
One of the best ways to overcome rejection is to surround yourself with friends.It's important to be with your friends when you're going to see a movie, go out for a drink, or just hang out at home.If you're going through a rough patch, let your friends know and ask them if they can spend some time together.Some friends will try to reach out to you, but other friends might need to be invited.If your friends don't immediately reach out to you, try approaching them and telling them that you need some company.
Step 3: Do things that you enjoy.
It's helpful to seek out activities that make you happy if you're feeling rejection.Whether you enjoy listening to music, reading a book, watching a movie, or simply going for a walk or bike ride, doing things you love can help you feel better.
Step 4: Start writing.
Some people think that journaling won't help, but studies show that it can help people put their thoughts into perspective and remain positive.A high-quality journal is a good place to put your money.You will be more likely to use your journal every day if you know that the journal will stand up to abuse.You should set aside time every day to write in your journal.Set a timer so that you can write for longer periods of time.Allow yourself to experiment.Your journal isn't intended to be read by anyone else, so let yourself be open and honest.As you figure it out, give yourself permission to think on the page.It doesn't have to be a perfect document.It can be a lot of things.
Step 5: Know when to ask for assistance.
Maybe you were rejected in front of a group of people, or maybe you just had high hopes that things would work out with someone.If you're really devastated by a rejection, don't be afraid to talk about it.Try talking to a counselor or therapist if you don't think your friends or family will understand.There are many schools and universities that offer free counselors.
Step 6: Don't fear rejection.
It's important that you don't become afraid of rejection in the future, because it is natural to feel a little hurt after getting rejected.Catastrophizing involves assuming that one experience is part of a larger pattern.Rejection is not a horrible, life-or-death situation, even though it may be inconvenient and painful.Rejection is never permanent.Eventually, new opportunities will present themselves.
Step 7: You should separate yourself from rejection.
People respond to rejection by internalizing it.It is easy to think that someone's rejection is a reflection of their worth.It has nothing to do with how attractive or interesting a person is, or how likable they are.Compatibility is a large part of it.A person may not be ready for a relationship.It does not reflect on you.Don't allow someone else's approval or rejection to define your worth.You are just the way you are.
Step 8: Rejection can be seen as an opportunity.
It's unfortunate that your crush didn't feel the same way about you, and it might be a little painful.It's just one person, and they weren't right for you.Rejection is an opportunity to find a better situation with someone who will feel the same way about you.If your crush doesn't think you'll be compatible, that means there's someone else out there who will be even more compatible.
Step 9: Understand your partner preferences.
If your crush rejected you, it's possible that you were more attracted to their appearance than their personality.Now is a good time to be honest with yourself and figure out what you want from a partner.Think about the qualities you would want your partner to have.Maybe trustworthiness is more important to you than being warm and caring.A common trait people seek in a partner is shared interests.Before you start having feelings for anyone else, figure out what you want from a partner.
Step 10: Be aware of your emotional reactions.
While ideal partner preferences shape the type of person you actively seek out, you also have an emotional reaction to most people you meet.Sometimes we're blinded by our looks or charming personality, but it's important to learn to recognize the emotional reaction of someone in your presence.You can't change unconscious emotional reactions.You can learn to recognize the emotional reaction that you have to a person if you analyze your emotions over time.
Step 11: Evaluate crushes for compatibility.
When it comes to longterm compatibility, you may not be a good match for someone if you have a positive emotional reaction to that person.Learning how to evaluate a crush for real, meaningful compatibility can be the difference between frustrating relationship problems and a meaningful, fulfilling partnership.Think about the personality quirks you like the most.Are you a type?Does that type work well for you?Are you only looking at the surface of people you have a crush on?Trust your gut.If you find someone attractive but don't have much in common with them, it's probably not going to work out.If you learn to trust your gut as you evaluate potential partners, you will avoid getting hurt and rejected in the future.