Feelings of guilt, regret, and shame over a mistake can linger and cause pain, even though we all know these truths.Forgiveness can be difficult with self-forgiveness.It's important for your well-being and that of those around you that you accept and move on from your mistake.You can learn from mistakes, and you can get past them.
Step 1: Acknowledge your mistake.
You will never be able to get past a mistake if you don't confront it.You need to know what happened and who is to blame.This is not the time to make excuses.The reality of the result doesn't change even if you were distracted or overburdened.Even if you can, don't try to share the blame.You need to accept your mistake if you want to control your role.We can use our guilt to prevent us from accepting the consequences.Maybe the other person won't punish us if we're already punishing ourselves with guilt.If you want to move on, you have to accept that there are consequences and that punishing yourself won't remove them.
Step 2: Discuss your feelings and findings.
It is embarrassing enough to admit a mistake to yourself, but not to tell others about it.Sharing your mistake and how you feel about it is a key step towards letting go and moving on.You may want to confide in a friend, therapist, spiritual guide, or someone else you can trust before sharing your mistake with anyone.It may seem silly, but admitting your mistake to someone else is important in the process of accepting it.Sharing your mistakes reminds you that no one is perfect.When dealing with a mistake, these truths are easy to forget.
Step 3: Make afresh.
After admitting your mistake to yourself and anyone who may have been hurt by it, the next step is to make things right.You may discover that your error was not that big of a deal.If it was a big deal, working to make amends will help you to move past it.The sooner you make up for a mistake, the better.If you make a mistake at work that costs your company a client and/or money, it is best to inform your boss as soon as possible, but give yourself some time to make up for the mistake.If you don't address a mistake, it will only make it worse and increase your guilt.Sometimes your mistake won't hurt a particular person or a person who is no longer around for an apology.Maybe you didn't want to visit your grandmother because you were too busy.Paying it forward is something that should be considered in such cases.Maybe you could volunteer at an assisted-living facility or spend more time with your elderly relatives.
Step 4: You can learn from your mistake.
It may seem like a waste of time to look into the details of your mistake, but a close examination is the best way to learn from it.Mistakes can become worthwhile if you learn from them.Get to the root causes of your mistake, such as jealousy or impatience.You can more easily identify solutions if you category the mistake in terms of jealousy or impatience.Living in self-condemnation and contempt leads to personal stagnation, so remember: choosing to learn from a mistake is the path to growth.
Step 5: There is a plan of action.
Identifying the cause of your mistake is the first step towards actually learning from it.It's not enough to simply say "I won't do that again" without determining actionable changes that will prevent you from repeating the same mistake.You don't have to analyze the details of a mistake to learn from it, although admitting your fault is an essential step.Lay out what you will do differently the next time you face a similar situation, and think about what specifically you could have done differently in that situation.Take some time to write down an action plan.It can help you plan for avoiding the same mistake.You stretched yourself too thin with so many responsibilities that you couldn't keep track of them all, so you forgot to pick up your friend from the airport.You apologized to your friend after you identified the problem.When things get busy, create a plan of action to organize and prioritize.When you are stretched too thin, think about ways to say no.
Step 6: Repetition may be caused by habits.
Bad habits can be to blame for many of our most common mistakes.You need to address the habits that cause the mistake to prevent repetition.It is best to focus on one habit at a time and not try to identify and correct all your bad habits at once.What are the chances that you can quit smoking and spend more time with your mother at the same time?If you want to break one bad habit, consider your readiness to tackle another.Make the changes easy to understand.The more complex your plan is, the more likely it is to fail.If you want to wake up earlier, go to bed earlier or set your bedroom clock ahead ten minutes.There are ways to fill the void created by your former habit.Spending more time with your kids, volunteering, and exercising are positive ways to make it positive.
Step 7: You should cut yourself some slack.
People who have trouble moving beyond mistakes suffer from unrealistic expectations.It's admirable to hold yourself to a high standard of behavior, but if you want to please everyone, you have to be perfect.If you examine it honestly, more often than not, you will find that it is not as bad as you think.As you would for others, show compassion for yourself.If your best friend made the same mistake, how would you treat him or her?You would show your support in almost all cases.Remember that you should be your own best friend, and act accordingly.
Step 8: You should forgive yourself.
It can be difficult to give others the benefit of the doubt, but it's still easy to forgive ourselves for small mistakes.Forgiveness begins at home, so you need to be able to start with yourself.It's a foolish task, but it can help you forgive yourself, as in, "I forgive myself for spending the rent money on a night out on the town."It's a good idea to give yourself a self-reminder that you're not making mistakes.You are not a mistake or an error.You are an imperfect being who makes mistakes and grows because of them.
Step 9: Care for yourself.
If you are struggling with letting go of a mistake, it is a good idea to remind yourself that holding on may be bad for your own health and detrimental to the well-being of those closest to you.It's up to you to find a way to get past your mistake.When you experience guilt, chemicals are released in your body that can increase heart rate, blood pressure, and cholesterol levels.It can be harmful to your health to have excessive guilt.The saying "misery has company" has real merit, because someone who doesn't allow themself a break from guilt tends to drag down all those around him as well.Your spouse, children, friends, and even pets will suffer part of the price for your mistake because you will be more withdrawn and critical of them.
Step 10: You should move forward.
You need to be able to let go of your mistake once you have forgiven yourself and done your best to make up for it.The lesson learned will benefit you going forward.When your mind wanders back to your mistake, remind yourself that you have been forgiven.If you need to remind yourself that the case is closed, say it out loud.The Positive Emotion Refocusing Technique is used by some people.Close your eyes and take two deep breaths to do it.You can either picture someone you love deeply or an image of natural beauty.Bring your guilt with you as you explore this happy place.If you want to let go and find peace in this space, you have to open your eyes and leave your guilt behind.You can live your life without regrets if you move forward from mistakes.It is better to learn from mistakes than to not try.For adults dealing with a mistake, falling down is practice, and getting up to try again is progress.