Time constraints and unethical requests are some of the reasons why you wouldn't say no to a coworker.When faced with a co-worker who regularly asks you to help complete their work, there will be a time when you no longer want to be taken advantage of.Take some steps to learn how to decline a coworker in a diplomatic way if this is the case.
Step 1: Listen to what your coworker has to say.
Hearing them out is respectful even if you know you are going to say something.Being rude doesn't build enemies.Before you make your response, let your coworker finish talking.Before giving a polite "no" after they are done talking, allow a respectful pause to follow.
Step 2: Be nice.
You shouldn't be rude to your coworker.It's hard enough for most people to hear you say no.Apologizing for not being able to help your coworker is polite, as is smiling and having a good attitude.It is possible to say, "I'm so sorry that I couldn't help you this time."
Step 3: You have to explain yourself.
Explaining why you are saying no is an extension of being polite.You don't have to give an explanation, but doing so helps the other person not feel upset.You will continue to have a pleasant work environment if you give an explanation.You should not lie in your explanation.Tell your coworker that you can't help them.You don't respect your coworker if you make up prior engagements.This damages your reputation and ruins your credibility.Something like, "I really can't help with that project today because of a prior engagement I scheduled after work."
Step 4: Use "I" statements.
If you want to prevent your coworker from feeling upset, you need to make your refusal all about yourself.Say something like, "I'm sorry I can't help you."Keeping your refusal limited to things that are your responsibility can help prevent your coworker from getting angry.Don't tell your coworker that they need help because they are lazy.
Step 5: If you have an alternative, offer it.
Maybe you can help another day.If it doesn't fit your time schedule, give your coworker alternatives.If they help today, but you aren't free from a current project until Friday, offer to help them.You can look like you're still interested in helping if you use alternatives.Don't just make up alternatives to put a coworker off, really intend to help in the different way that you offer.You can ask if you are flexible about the deadline.If you don't really want to help the coworker, then you should not offer an alternative.Say no and offer a short explanation.
Step 6: They will become angry.
If you give a negative answer, you should prepare yourself for the negative response.You won't be surprised by their response if you expect your coworker to be disappointed or angry.Civil reactions to other coworkers are important so that there is no violence in the workplace.
Step 7: Stay calm.
Stay calm if your coworker becomes upset.Do not react like they are acting towards you.Staying calm can help diffuse a situation.Other people acting the same way when someone is upset adds fuel to the fire.Practice speaking slowly or removing yourself from the room to stay calm.
Step 8: You may be burning a bridge.
Sometimes people don't understand when others say no, and they may give you an ultimatum.If you say no to a coworker, they might not be willing to work with you again.You should decide ahead of time if you're okay with it.If you know you will lose the relationship if you say no to a coworker, decide how you'll react.Will you let it go or will you tell your boss what happened?If you find that you don't want to burn the bridge, perhaps you should work with the coworker to find a way to help them that works better for you.
Step 9: The interaction should be done with an objective third party.
If you had to say no to your coworker and they reacted negatively, find someone to talk to.It will help you understand their reaction so that you don't make them angry in the future.You have to be okay with people getting upset if you can't help it.An objective third party can be found, like an HR rep, a coworker, or even someone at home.Someone who won't gossip about it and spread rumors at work is the goal.
Step 10: Determine if the request is in bad taste.
One reason you might want to say no to a coworker is because of their request being unethical.Maybe a coworker has fallen behind on a project and they want you to cut a few corners to get it done on time.It is okay to say no if it is going to break the rules.Other unethical requests include asking you to do more than your share on a project, to cover up their failure to perform a task, or to keep silent about an issue you know is wrong.
Step 11: If the request is beyond your time constraints, make a decision.
It's possible to say no to a coworker because they want you to focus on another project.When you aren't working on this project, it's easy to offer your help at another time.If you are working on prioritized projects and this coworker keeps asking you to work on things outside of your job description, you may need to say no permanently.
Step 12: Make sure you can't help.
Before you say no to a coworker, make sure you can't help them.It's embarrassing to say no because you didn't think about it and then decide you can help them.Before answering your coworker, take your time looking at your schedule and weighing the pros and cons.