The majority of parents want to do what is best for their kids.Sometimes they end up doing more harm than good.Toxic parents can demoralize their kids and destroy their confidence if they don't realize their actions are toxic.If you have a toxic parent, you may have begun making excuses for them.To heal and develop a better relationship, it is important to stop making excuses and see toxic behavior.It is possible to come to terms with your parent's harmful behavior, set healthy boundaries, and take care of your mental and emotional health.
Step 1: Take a break from your parents.
You can gain perspective on your relationship with your parent by getting some space.You may get used to it if you are around toxic or abusive behavior all the time.Taking a break can help you understand what is wrong.It can be difficult to create some distance if you still live with your parents.Try joining extracurricular activities that keep you out of the house, spending time with friends who have healthier family dynamics, and arranging your sleep schedule to minimize the amount of toxic behavior you're exposed to.If you no longer live at home, it's a good idea to take a break from contact with them.
Step 2: You should give yourself time to process your feelings.
It can be difficult to come to terms with a parent's behavior.Don't judge yourself for the feelings you experience, and allow yourself time to experience them.Emotions include anger, sadness, guilt, and relief.
Step 3: You should remind yourself that emotional abuse is not your fault.
Toxic people can be abusive as well.Abusers are acting out their own pain.If you have been abused by your toxic parent, you should know that their behavior is not your fault and not a reflection on your own character.
Step 4: You can see a therapist.
Growing up with a toxic parent can cause emotional problems later in life.A mental health professional can help you with a number of issues.
Step 5: Determine which boundaries you want to set.
A good boundary protects you from harm.Think about the way your parent makes you feel.Establish boundaries that will shield you from their toxic behavior.If your parent calls you every day, you might decide to limit your calls to once a week.You don't have to respond immediately to texts or pick up the phone.
Step 6: Decide on the consequences.
When someone doesn't respect your boundaries, there are consequences.If your parent ignores your wishes, think about what you will do.You should choose consequences that you will follow through with.The best consequences come from the other person.If your toxic parent calls you and starts berating you for not having a phone conversation, you might decide to hang up the phone.
Step 7: Discuss your boundaries with your parent.
Have an honest conversation with your parent about what you need.Stay firm, but be kind.Tell your parent what you will do if they don't respect your boundaries.When you and your parent are calm, have the conversation.Your parent might be angry with you for setting limits.They don't want you to back down.It is your right to make your own boundaries.Use "I" language to frame your concerns.Try saying, "I feel stifled because of how much we talk, and I would rather schedule a chat once a week instead." instead of saying "It's not reasonable that you expect me to spend an hour on the phone with you every day."
Step 8: Follow through with consequences
It is possible that your parent will try to test your limits.Carry out the consequences you promised if they don't take your wishes seriously.If you don't follow through with a consequence, your parent will think they can keep violating your boundaries.
Step 9: Put your health and happiness first.
Trying to please a toxic parent is often pointless because you can't make everyone happy.To maintain your own happiness, make it a priority.If you were a toxic parent, learning to value yourself can be difficult.A therapist can help you regain your self-esteem.Even if you have done nothing wrong, you may feel guilty.Your therapist can help you overcome those feelings.
Step 10: You should surround yourself with people who are positive.
The damage of being raised by a toxic parent can be undone by your friends and family.Seek out people who make you feel appreciated.People who were raised by toxic parents are drawn to other toxic people later in life.Evaluate your relationships to make sure they are healthy.
Step 11: Take care of yourself.
Your brain and body can be damaged by emotional trauma.Establish a meditation routine, get enough cardiovascular exercise, and eat right to repair your physical health.You shouldn't eat foods made with sugar and flour.Eat lots of vegetables, whole grains, and lean meat.It's important to get enough Omega 3s in your diet.It is possible to reverse the damage of a toxic upbringing by meditating.
Step 12: Positive self-talk is good.
You may speak to yourself the same way if your parent criticizes you frequently.A new habit of talking to yourself can be created.If you make a mistake at work, tell yourself that it is not the end of the world.Everybody makes mistakes, and now I know how to fix them.Reread your positive messages when you're struggling.
Step 13: How much contact can you have with your parent?
A healthier relationship can be built with a toxic parent.The parent's behavior is too negative to be fixed.Should you cut off contact with your parent if they don't listen to you or cooperate with you?