How To Tell Your Parent You Want to Live With Your Other Parent
Being a child of divorced or separated parents is hard.You are often sent back and forth between parents when you deal with parents who don't get along.One of the scariest things you can do is to tell the other parent that you want to live with them.If you tell the other parent that you want to live with them, it will be easy to hurt them.It's important to be sensitive when telling your parent what you want so that they don't think you're trying to hurt them.Carefully consider your reasons for wanting to move before taking any action.
Step 1: Understand that your parent may be sad.
It may be difficult for you to watch and deal with the tug-of-war that goes on for custody when you are a child of divorced parents.In most cases, your parents are trying to do what is best for you, and if you tell them you don't want to live with them anymore, they may feel like they have failed you.You don't need to think that you have to live with a parent if you're unhappy just because you do not want to hurt them.It is not your job to keep your parents happy.It's important to be gentle because it may hurt them to hear that you want to leave.
Step 2: Think about why you want to leave.
Your other parent may allow you to do whatever you want, but is that the only reason?If the reasons you want to move out are good or not, take some time to think about it.It is easy for a parent who doesn't live with full time to look like a fun parent, but remember that they do not bear all of the responsibility for you.It is the parent who is responsible for making you happy and healthy most of the time.They have to make a lot of tough decisions about what's best for you.Will you need to change schools?Changing schools may be the biggest reason you want to move with your other parent, but if you are very happy at your current school, you may have to go somewhere you don't like.
Step 3: Don't say something out of anger.
Is the parent you live with doing something that made you angry?It can be tempting to tell them you want to live with your other parent in the heat of the moment.It is important that you do not use your other parent as a weapon when they make you angry.If you really want to live with the other parent, you should have a conversation with them, and think about the reasons why.
Step 4: List your reasons for wanting to leave.
There are many reasons why you want to live with your parent.Some of the reasons may have nothing to do with the parent you live with.Make a list of why you want to live with your other parent.It is not necessary for you to give this list to the parent you live with, as long as you explain the reasons you don't want to live there.Make a list so that you can talk to your parent about why you want to leave.Maybe you want to live with the other parent because they live closer to your school, or maybe it is a different reason.It could be that the parent you live with is dating a lot of different people and you don't like being around them.
Step 5: You should know what you want from the conversation.
Do you want to live with your other parent, but never see them again?Would you like to see them on the weekends?Do you want to live with the same parent, but spend more time with another?There are many ways in which custody can be divided between parents.Before you tell them you want to live with the other parent, you should know what kind of custody arrangement you would like.You can show your parent that you have thought about it during the conversation.You should talk with your parent about when you want to see them.
Step 6: Take into account the lifestyle of your parent.
It is possible that your other parent does not want you to live with them because they do not have time to give you the support you need.Think about whether or not your other parent will allow you to live with them.Maybe your parent has a problem that they have to deal with.They may not be able to take care of you as a parent.They're never at home when they travel all week.
Step 7: Talk to someone you trust.
Tell the person you trust how you are feeling.This could be the parent you want to live with, a grandparent, or a guidance counselor.Tell them why you want to live with the other parent.It is possible to understand why you want to move by talking to someone.The person you talk to could give you advice on how to start the conversation.If your parents don't get along well, talking with them may not be the best idea if you are looking for an impartial ear.
Step 8: Ask your parent if they have time to talk about something important.
If you say you want to live with your other parent out of nowhere, they will be angry and sad.They won't be able to listen if they are shocked by what you say.Let them know that you need some time to talk about something important to you.If they are busy with something, they may have to wait.Even if you don't shock them, they may get mad.If you can tell that they are in a bad mood, don't ask them to have this talk.
Step 9: Tell them you love them.
You may be afraid that you will hurt your parents if you move out.It might be hard to tell them that you want to leave, but it will help them understand how much you love them.You can say, "before I tell you what's going on, I want you to know that I love you very much."It might be difficult to hear what I am about to say, but please don't think I'm not interested.
Step 10: Tell them why you want to live with your other parent.
If that is the situation, say, "I would like to live with Dad"Try to explain the reasons calmly and clearly.If the reasons you don't want to live with the current parent are because of how they treat you or because they have problems that are affecting you, then bringing up these reasons may make your parent mad or embarrassed.It is important to be honest.
Step 11: Give them time to think about what you said.
It is difficult to predict how your parent will react.They can get angry, cry, or not seem upset.Give them time to think about what you said.Listen to what they are saying if they want to talk.They may want some time to think about it.Give them time.They might say no completely.There isn't much you can do in this case.It is possible to talk about the matter with your other parent.They may be able to convince the parent to reconsider.
Step 12: Keep calm.
If you don't like your parent reacting in a certain way, do your best to stay calm.Don't yell at them.Try to talk in a mature way.Ask them if they can explain why it is not a good idea.If they have given you many reasons, you should try to understand them.If your parent is the one who believes that you should do what you are told, they don't need to explain why.If this happens, you may be wasting your time, but try to remember that the best thing you can do is to keep talking to them so that they don't just blow you off.
Step 13: It should be brought up again later.
Tell your parent again in a month or two if they say no.They will see that you really want to live with the other parent, and you aren't just trying to cause problems.Try to approach the conversation in the same way if you have to try again.It will show them that you can make your own decisions if you bring up the conversation as maturely as possible.