How To Tell your parents you have an eating disorder.
It can be hard to talk to one's parents about a serious issue such as an eating disorder.Eating disorders are real and can be very serious if you don't talk to your parents about them.In the long run, the initial conversation will pay off if you receive your parents' love, advice, and support.
Step 1: Determine your reasons.
Why do you want to tell your parents about your eating disorder?Is it because they will treat you differently?Is it to ask for their support?Do you need to ask if they will pay for you to see a mental health professional?You can more easily steer the conversation in the way that you want it to go if you know what your goals are.
Step 2: Prepare things.
Eating disorders are explained in some reading material.Information about what people do in this matter should be provided in the material.If you have one, you can either print it off the internet or give it to your counselor.If your parents don't know much about eating disorders, you can educate them with the most up-to-date information.You can review the materials at http://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org.
Step 3: There is a quiet place and time.
There is a private and quiet spot where you can have a conversation.If you don't want your siblings to be involved in the conversation, think about the times of the week when you are home with your parents.It is possible to find alone time with your parents.You can have a private conversation in a quiet room in your home.You can sit with them at a park if you don't have a room.
Step 4: Take a deep breath.
Try to be calm before you have a conversation.It is possible that you will get nervous before the conversation with your parents.Hold your breath for a few seconds, then exhale through your nose for six or more seconds.When you find yourself in a calm and relaxed state, repeat this process.
Step 5: Tell a friend.
If you have a friend who has gone through a similar situation, or have had a difficult conversation with their parents, ask them for help.It may help reduce stress, but you won't get much insight into how serious conversations between parents and children are.The dynamic between parent and child may be different in different families.
Step 6: Tell them what you need.
Tell them something important and tell them what you hope to get from the conversation.If you want them to listen and offer emotional support, let them know that.Let them know if you want their advice.Mention that if you need financial support to see a mental health professional.
Step 7: Start broad.
Let them know that you want to have a private conversation.This means starting the conversation in a way that shows you have a problem that you want to talk about."I have a problem that I need to tell you about."Is it possible to go somewhere private to talk?I need your advice on an issue.Can we go for a walk?I need your help with something private and I want to talk to you alone.
Step 8: You should keep your parents' perspective in mind.
They might not know certain things about you, or they might see the world differently than you do.To ensure that you are all on the same page, try to keep their perspectives in mind.Keep an eye on their faces as you explain things.Ask the parent if anything you said is unclear.
Step 9: You should update them on what you know.
Tell your parents everything you know about your eating disorder.Do you think you have an eating disorder but have never been diagnosed by a mental health professional?Different types of eating disorders can have different effects on your health.Your parents should know this information.If you have Anorexia nervosa, be sure to describe it.Binge eating disorder involves eating large amounts of food.A bulimia nervosa involves recurrent episodes of eating large quantities of food followed by behaviors that are intended to reduce weight gain.Eating disorder is not specified.Night eating syndrome, purging disorder, and atypical anorexia nervosa may be included.
Step 10: Give them time to ask questions.
Allow your parents to ask you questions once you have told them about your eating disorder.Be honest with them and answer as best you can.It's fine to say you don't know the answer to a question.Tell them that you don't want to answer their questions.Keep in mind that your parents want to help you.If what they are asking is relevant to your eating disorder, you should not answer.
Step 11: Tell them you have a plan.
You should remind your parents of what you need to accomplish your goals once you have had the conversation with them.It could be a stay in an eating disorder clinic.Ask your parents for advice if you don't know what you want to do.Most parents love to give their children advice.
Step 12: Give them books to read.
If you prepared reading materials for them, give them to your parents.They should be given some time to read the materials.After they have read up on your eating disorder, set another time to meet with them.Don't overload them with too many materials or materials that are not relevant to your eating disorder.
Step 13: Don't argue or whine.
The conversation could get emotional.It's possible that your parents aren't being as understanding as they should be, or that they are unaware of the seriousness of eating disorders.Try to keep the conversation mature and adult-like, as anything other than that won't get you far toward getting the help you need.Try to have the conversation at a later time when you are not as upset if you find your parents aren't understanding you.
Step 14: Mention that they are not to blame.
Your parents may view your disorder as their fault.It is important to keep the conversation going, either by getting you into treatment or by offering emotional support.