The authors of fairy tales would think that living happily ever after is possible.There are things you can do to increase the happiness factor in your relationships, at work and on a personal level, but we know that life is a balance of both happiness and the opposite.Having realistic expectations, a forgiving spirit, and the ability to be optimistic are all qualities that can help you attain your unique version of living the dream.
Step 1: The person is flawed and I love them all.
When you make a commitment to someone, you have to be willing to accept their limitations as well as their good qualities.Don't commit to a relationship if your partner is awkward at parties or knows how to fry an egg.If your expectations don't match reality, you're likely to end up disappointed.There will be a lot of fighting if you try to change your partner.You could hurt his or her self-esteem.Accepting a person for who he or she is and getting the same acceptance in return is what love is all about.You should be grateful you found someone who accepts your flaws as well.
Step 2: It's time to drop the fairy tale mentality.
People who think romantic love resembles the Cinderella story have a harder time facing reality.Eleanor Roosevelt once said, "Happiness isn't a goal, it's a by-product."Chances are high that you will not find a lover that will fill you with joy every time you look at them.Talk to your partner about what makes them happy as well.The Disneyfied version of life is fun to watch in the movies, but it doesn't look like real life.Life after the wedding day is filled with stress and hardship to balance out the bliss.It can feel like a magical relationship.They don't operate on magic and serendipity, but on hard work after the first few years.
Step 3: The passion should be kept alive by surprising each other.
After a few years of washing each other's dirty dishes, the initial flame might die down, but that doesn't mean it has to go out.A couple can stay interested in one another if they pick up new hobbies, try new things together, and embrace newness.You get a taste of butterflies when you surprise each other.It's fine to have pleasant date night activities, but you lose out on activities that are new and different.The passion you felt when you first met will not last forever.After years of dealing with life's ups and downs, many couples appreciate the deepened trust and friendship that comes from being a team.
Step 4: To keep the relationship strong, be willing to put in a lot of effort.
Job loss, illness and death of family members, the trials of having kids, financial duress are just some of the hardships that every couple faces.A lot of stress can be put on a relationship.If you make an effort to get through the hurdles in your relationship, you will emerge stronger than ever.Don't let your feelings for the person change even if you disagree with them.Research shows that couples who insult each other end up damaging their relationship.Fight in a loving way, argue about the issue at hand, and not personally attack your partner's intelligence or abilities.
Step 5: You need to be compatible.
It's difficult because no relationship is perfect and they all require work, but it is possible that you're in a relationship that requires more work than finding a new partner.If you don't share the same basic values, it can be difficult to make a relationship work.It's not to say that people of different faiths can't be happy together, but they will have to work harder at it.Differences in political beliefs often indicate fundamental differences in the way that we perceive the world.If one half of the relationship likes to go out every night and the other half prefers to read a good book, it will be hard to find mutual interests that will sustain your relationship.It's said that as many as half of divorces are related to finances.If one half of the relationship is determined to be multimillionaire while the other is happy with a modest house and plenty of time to hike, this will likely be a source for conflict later.
Step 6: If you get addicted to the past, you will lose your mind.
People often say things like "We don't talk like we used to" or "He's just not like the man I married".You have to be prepared for your partner to grow and mature in a long relationship.You can't expect someone to act the same way they did a decade ago because we continue to mature throughout our lives.Instead of focusing on the things you did in the past, look at the people you've become and what you can do together.
Step 7: Don't depend on a partner to be happy.
Being in a relationship can increase happiness, but it can also be a source of sadness.It's possible to have a happy life as a single person.If you know that something is not right, don't buy into the idea that the only way to live happily ever after is with a prince or princess.
Step 8: Invest in people rather than things.
People are happier when they spend time with their loved ones.If you arrange your life to be more family focused, you may feel happier in the long run.There are ways to spend more time with friends and family.If you have to, schedule it so you can see people more often.Close friends are just as important as family.If your family is hostile, you can still find happiness by spending time with your friends.It helps to give back to strangers.You can find a way to help people by volunteering.
Step 9: Don't forget to appreciate what you have.
This is an important way to increase your happiness.You are hurting your chances at happiness if you're a "grass is green" person.When you switch jobs or move to a new city, you may not know that the grass has brown spots.If you want something different, focus on loving what you have.Make a list of things you are thankful for.Writing it all out can show you how much you have to give.You will be reminded of the good things in your life when you post the list.There are ways to add more positive elements to your life if you can't find things to write down.If you want to make a new friend or learn a skill that brings you pleasure, go out of your way.Don't dwell on the negative and cultivate the positive.
Step 10: Don't be angry.
It is affecting you more than the subject of your ire if you carry anger around with you.Holding a grudge isn't going to make you feel better if you have a good reason to be angry and bitter.If there is nothing you can do to change the situation, let it go.You will be a happier person for it.You should be a more open person.Instead of dwelling on the negative comments, try to let them roll off your back.Let go of jealousy and envy.You can control your reactions to situations, even if you can't control other people.Keeping negative feelings inside you for a long period of time is going to get you down.
Step 11: People who are happy are what you should surround yourself with.
Emotions are infectious.It will be hard to be happy around your friends if they are negative.It is important to find people who make you feel good, too.If there is a person in your life who makes you feel bad more often than good, you should have a conversation about the problem.If that doesn't work, you can give yourself permission to end the relationship for the sake of your health and happiness.
Step 12: Make sure your job is doing what it's supposed to.
Not everyone gets to make a living doing what they want to do, and even those who do have job dissatisfaction sometimes.When it comes to your work, the most important thing is that you feel appreciated by your employer and you get adequate credit for your efforts.Even if it isn't your dream job, you can still be happy.Your work is not going to be perfect.If necessary, make changes if necessary by taking the negative with the positive and learning what you can and can't live with.Seek career counseling if you are having a hard time finding work.
Step 13: Time outside.
Spending 20 minutes a day outside increases happiness.The time you spend walking in the park or laying out on the beach is essential for good mental health, so stop thinking of outside time as a luxury.It's a necessity.Since you're busy with other things, make it a priority to spend time outside.You can schedule a walk before or after work or school, or spend the evening in the backyard.A city street isn't going to have the same effect as a park, so try to find a place to spend time in a natural setting.
Step 14: The closer you are to your job, the easier it is to do it.
People with long commute times are less happy than people who live close to work.It might be worth taking a less prestigious job in order to have a shorter trip to work.If you are brave enough to make the leap, you can increase your happiness.Spending less time commute gives you more time to do things like hang out with your family, cook a good meal, or go for a walk outside.The activities lead to decreased stress and increased happiness.
Step 15: Get a better night of sleep.
You are more sensitive to negative emotions when you don't get adequate sleep.A comment you normally wouldn't let roll off your back might make you cry or have a panic attack.It's best to get seven to eight hours of sleep a night.You will be better able to deal with any issues that come your way throughout the day.
Step 16: It's a good idea to exercise frequently.
Exercising your body makes you feel better.This effect is increased by doing it every day.Work up to exercise in small steps if you don't like it.Aim to get 30 minutes to an hour of exercise every day.Exercise helps you feel more in touch with your body's capabilities and leads to a boost in self-esteem.Exercise is an effective treatment for depression.