Have people told you that you're too tight?Do you feel like you can't loosen up even when everyone is having a good time?Do you want to be able to take a joke?If that is the case, then it's time to put on those sweatpants and loosen up.If you want to know how to go from being a nail-biting worrywart to the girl on the beach with no cares other than when the sun will go down, then you have to see Step 1.
Step 1: Accept that you don't have control over everything.
Some people have a hard time getting loosened up because they want to be in control of everything.They want to be able to predict what's going to happen.They want to know when they will succeed, how their boss will react, and how they can get what they want.Life doesn't work that way.It has both good and bad curve balls.You have to be prepared for the unexpected if you want to loosen up.It takes some time to get here.One way to start is to think of multiple outcomes.You're up for a promotion.Instead of assuming you'll get it, think of the different options and how you will react to them, like you may get the promotion, or you might be told that you need to work harder if you really want that promotion.You'll be less freaked out if you're prepared in advance.You can't prepare for things in advance.Maybe you and your boyfriend are on their way to a romantic trip when your car breaks down.Sometimes, you have to laugh at the things you can't control.Don't be a micro-planner.When something doesn't go your way, you are guaranteed to be frustrated and disappointed.
Step 2: Let go of standards that aren't realistic.
It may be in the way of you being loosened up.Everyone is expected to be on their best behavior 24/7.You might think that your teachers, your boss, friends, and your significant other are able to read your mind all the time.The world should give you what you deserve.If you want to be able to determine how everyone around you should act, then you have to learn to accept the fact that the world is imperfect.When you stop expecting people to act in a certain way, you will be pleasantly surprised.People are not perfect.They will be rude and immature at times.That's okay.You are guaranteed to loosen up if you let go of your high expectations.Let go of the unrealistic standards you set for yourself.When it doesn't happen for you, you are bound to be tense and disappointed.
Step 3: You should be comfortable making mistakes.
People who are uptight freak out when they make a mistake because it doesn't go perfectly.You have to learn to accept failure as a learning experience instead of punishing yourself for not doing what you could have.Life would be boring if we all completed our tasks like robots.Think about what you learned from your mistake and how you can use it in the future.People who can't loosen up are stuck in a situation where they feel like huge loser if they make a mistake.
Step 4: Let things slide and learn to let go of things.
People who can't loosen up get hung up on everything that someone else does wrong and they have an annoying personality trait.If your lab partner forgot to do his part of the project, or you got too drunk at your birthday party, how much energy do you want to spend wishing other people acted differently?The answer is no energy at all.It takes all kinds of people to make the world, so learn to take a deep breath, accept that, and move on.Take some deep breaths, take a bathroom break, and learn to look past the annoying behavior if you need to.Talking about the person's behavior is the worst thing you can do because it will make you feel worse and make everyone look uptight.Think about the scheme of things.Will Bill's antics annoy you even twelve hours from now?Why don't you stop letting it annoy you if the answer is no?
Step 5: Have a realistic idea of what to expect from a situation.
This can help you loosen up a bit.Before you go into a situation, make a list of all the different things that can happen, instead of the one thing you expect to happen.You're throwing a birthday party.The best case scenario is that everyone shows up, it's the best party ever, people will be talking about it for a long time.Some things are bound to go wrong, for example, a few guests who promised to come won't make it, some people will have too many drinks, and your crush will act weird.If something doesn't happen according to plan, the less likely you are to freak out.That's not to say that you shouldn't expect the best.If something less-than-great happens, you're less likely to freak out and cause a commotion.
Step 6: Don't take yourself seriously.
This is a quality that people have trouble with.You may have a hard time laughing in the face of crisis because you think that you are a very serious, important, busy person who cannot be bothered to point out his or her own flaws.Make a list of your flaws and poke fun at them.It's better to know what your weaknesses are than to have someone point them out.The key is not to be too sensitive.No one will be able to relax around you if you act like you're going to cry or get upset.Do you want to be that person who stops people from having fun?
Step 7: You can see the situation from another person's point of view.
Understanding where the people who are bothering you are from is a trick you can use to relax.At your birthday party,Marcia got too drunk and tried to make out with your lamp.It's annoying, but remember that she was dumped that week and has been acting off ever since.Mark has been taking care of his sick mother and may not have turned in his project on time.If you think about some of the reasons that people may not act the way you want them to act, you'll be able to accept their behavior more readily.There is always a reason for someone to act out of line.If you dig deeper, you will be able to find an explanation for it.People who need to relax live on explanations.
Step 8: Have some fun.
You can still think of yourself as the smart one or the serious one, and have some fun once in a while.Go bowling.Play games.Get drunk on wine and have a good time with your friends.Try on silly costumes.Run around the beach.Do something that requires a small amount of your brain power.It will feel good.Don't worry, ambitions, or problems, just live in the moment.Being fun and silly will help you be a happier and less tense person.Don't be scripted.It's not necessary to plan a time for brainless fun.If you don't feel like talking about your stock options when you hang out with friends, then get silly!Do something new.You can take a salsa class, go to a comedy show, or put temporary tattoos on friends.It would be even better if it would appeal to a fifth graders.
Step 9: To take a joke, learn to do it.
This is important to loosen up.If someone teases you, makes fun of you or makes a joke as a response to a comment you've made, you have to learn to laugh it off.You will have a reputation for being uptight and no fun to be around if you can't take a joke directed at you.Agree with the person and then dish it back.You have the right to be upset if the joke is meant to hurt, but in most cases people are just trying to keep you on your toes and to let you know that nobody's perfect!
Step 10: Break rules.
This does not mean that you should steal an iPod or break into a car.If you see someone breaking the rules, you should stop being so obsessed with sticking to them.Don't follow every assignment because it will make you feel bad.You can be the person who says, "Stop it, you guys!" if you're hanging out with friends who are acting recklessly.
Step 11: Take a break
Sometimes you need to take a break in the middle of the action to relax.If you feel like a drum in the middle of work, school, or even a fun session with friends, then you just need to chill out for a few minutes and look at cute photos of cats.Taking a break from the action doesn't mean you're weak.If you step out in the middle of a tense time, you will be able to relax.If you're a type-A, hard working person, then you may feel like you won't get a break until your task is done, but in reality, you can get it done if you take half an hour away.
Step 12: Give yourself some rest.
Your body is chronically exhausted without you realizing it, which is one of the reasons it is hard to loosen up.You will have more energy and peace of mind if you get enough rest, and you won't let the most basic challenges upset you.Aim to get at least 7 hours of sleep and to wake up at the same time every morning.When it's time for bed, you don't want to be wired and restless.Small changes can have a big impact on how you view the world.If you're feeling stressed out in the middle of the day, you should take a 15-20 minute power nap.
Step 13: Go for a walk outside.
Walking for 20 minutes a day and getting some fresh air can make you feel more relaxed and at peace.If you work from home or if you spend most of your time at home, make sure to go outside at least three times a day.You'll be surprised by how relaxed and rejuvenated you feel when you're outside, and how much less the small stuff will bother you.
Step 14: Hang out with people who are relaxed.
This is a large one.You have to hang out with other people who are more chill than you are if you want to be able to loosen up and not be so obsessed with being perfect.They don't have to be a guitar-playing hippie, but they should be people who know how to kick back whenever they feel like it, and who are less obsessed with the small details of life.You will feel more relaxed when these people rub off on you.It's bound to make you even more uptight if you hang out with people who are obsessed with perfect grades, the perfect career, etc.
Step 15: It's time to declutter your life.
If you feel more organized and on top of your game, you will feel like a more relaxed person.You might find it hard to loosen up because you can't find anything in your closet, you keep losing important documents, or you have a lot of stuff.Take 30 minutes a day to sort out your space, and you will be amazed at how lighter you'll feel.
Step 16: Exercise.
Getting some exercise will help you burn steam, give your body a positive outlet, and give you the energy you need to face the day.Make a goal of exercising for at least 30 minutes a day, whether you're running, biking, rock climbing, or swimming, and you will be able to burn off a lot of that negative energy.You can laugh while you burn calories if you have a friend with you.You might feel like you don't have time for exercise if you're stressed out all the time.You will be able to carve out time for your mind and body if you can move your schedule around.
Step 17: A massage is needed.
Take care of the tension in your neck, back, and body by going to a massage parlor.If you don't like it, you can get a friend to give you a massage.It will help you relax in times of high stress.Do not knock it until you try it.It's possible that you'll sign up for weekly massages before you know it.
Step 18: Do some yoga.
One of the benefits of yoga is that it helps people relax and live in the moment.If you want to focus on your mind, you can take a power yoga class.Just practicing a few times a week can help you loosen up.You may end up practicing on your own if you really enjoy the classes.
Step 19: A person dances.
If you want to get into a dance contest with your friends, blast your music and dance alone in your room.Whether you hang out at home, hit up the clubs, or even enroll in a dance class, dancing can help you get rid of some of that negative energy, learn to experiment, and generally have fun.
Step 20: Relax.
It is possible to be more relaxed throughout the day with just a few minutes of mediation a day.If you want to find a quiet place in your home, take a seat, close your eyes, and focus on your breath.As you relax your body one part at a time, feel the breath going in and out of it.If you want to reach a calm, happy place, ignore noises and distraction.You will be prepared for the challenges ahead of you when you're done.
Step 21: You can drink a cup of tea or coffee.
The routine of making a cup of tea or coffee is relaxing for many people.This morning ritual will get you started on a calm, relaxing note.If you want to make yourself more tense, make sure you don't over use the caffeine.
Step 22: Don't you want to laugh more?
Even if you're having a bad day, laughing can help you loosen up.If you want to make a habit of laughing more in your daily life, you need to watch a comedy show, hang out with your funniest friend, and watch silly videos.It may sound silly to force yourself to laugh, but this will help you take any challenges with a grain of salt and to be able to stand back and laugh at your flaws instead of feeling tense whenever something goes wrong.
Step 23: If you need to make a major life change to loosen up, look at it.
It's possible that your job is taking all of the life out of you.Maybe your three best friends are neurotic basket cases who have turned you into a complete worrywart for no reason.Maybe you've spent too much time doing what your parents want you to do and feel like you can't do what you want.If changing your attitude and making a series of small changes just isn't working for you, then you may have to stop and think about any big changes that are necessary to your future happiness.List all of the things that are making you stressed and unhappy.It may be time to make a big move if you see a pattern and most of them are coming from one source.In the end, you'll be a happier person because of this.