It's important to have good relationships and friendship.Some relationships become so draining that you need to disengage.You can end contact with someone who is not worth your time.You can either be upfront about the fact that the relationship needs to end, or you can simply stop contact.Many people are prone to forming negative relationships, so you should be aware of how to identify toxic relationships.Make an effort to move forward after a bad relationship.It's important to surround yourself with positive, happy people after a relationship ends.
Step 1: Take off contact.
The easiest way to end a friendship is indirectly.You may be guilty of not being upfront with someone.A confrontation can be more trouble than it's worth if a person is difficult to deal with.If you are upfront about ending the relationship, try to gradually see less of this person.It is possible to stop sharing privileged information with someone.Do not talk about your personal life with this person.Don't return phone calls or texts.Don't invite this person to every social event you attend.This person will eventually notice that you are not interested in the relationship.Be vague if this person asks you where you've been.Say something like "I've just been busy" or "Work's been really stressed out."Not everyone deserves an official confrontation if you dislike the idea of being dishonest.You don't owe this person anything because you feel that he is a loser and draining your time and energy.The person in question will eventually take the hint.Sometimes people catch on to the fact that they're being cold-shouldered.The person may want to know why you are ignoring them.It's a good idea to be honest about why you're ending this relationship.
Step 2: Prepare in advance of the event.
Prepare ahead of time if you need to have a confrontation with someone.You should decide what you want out of the conversation as well as your expectations for the relationship going forward.Think about why you're ending the relationship.In anger, you may say things like, "I don't want to be your friend because you're a loser."This is probably not productive.If you say things that will lead to an angry response from the other person, you will only make the situation worse.Explain why this relationship is not working for you.It seems like it's one-sided.Do you feel like you're being taken advantage of?You don't have to tell the person everything you know.Someone who is considered a loser will not take criticism well.After writing out your issues, try to keep it short and to the point.It's better if we both move on, because I don't feel like I'm benefiting from this friendship anymore.You may want to think about what you want in the future.It is possible that you want this person out of your life completely.If shutting a person out completely would make things difficult in family or social situations, see if there are other solutions.If you don't hang out with this person one-on-one anymore, you can still be friendly at larger gatherings.You could say, "I feel like we don't always click when we're just hanging out together."I think we would work better if we were more casual acquaintances.
Step 3: If possible, speak face-to-face.
A face-to-face confrontation is the best way to break up a relationship.In writing, meaning can be obscured.A real life conversation gives a person a chance to say goodbye.Try to talk to the person face-to-face.If you want to meet up, send a text or e-mail.Make it clear that you want to discuss something.Can we talk sometime this week?When are you free?It's a good idea to choose a time and place that works for both of you.If the conversation lasts long, you want to avoid external time constraints.Pick a night when you're both free and choose a location where you can talk.A loud bar is not good for having a conversation.The two of you can find some privacy in a quiet coffee shop.
Step 4: Write a letter or e-mail.
Sometimes it's not possible to talk face-to-face.Skip the in-person discussion if you are concerned that the person will get loud or aggressive.Avoid unnecessary drama and make a clean break.If you are concerned that meeting someone in person will cause more stress, write a letter or e-mail.It's a good idea to take some time to write.Before sending a letter or e-mail, write out a few drafts.It's important that you make things clear.It's a good idea to avoid the temptation to be mean.You're trying to move towards a brighter future by freeing yourself from loser in your life.You don't want to end a relationship with too much drama.Explain why your relationship needs to end.
Step 5: As simple as possible.
Do so if you feel like you can be straightforward.If someone is prone to emotional outbursts, it may be a good idea to keep information vague or obscure your reasons to avoid a blow-up.If you say, "I don't feel like I have time to keep up this relationship right now", you might be better off than if you said " I do not feel that you are a nice person."If you feel like you can be honest, do so.Try to express your feelings in a way that makes sense to you.Why are you ending the relationship?Tell the person how they hurt you.You don't have to have a laundry list of grievances, but you should give some reasons.Say something like, "I feel like you don't respect my needs."You never ask about me, I feel like you're always talking about yourself.The boundaries should be very clear.You don't want someone to hurt you.What you expect will be clear going forward.It's possible to say, "I want us to be civil when we're around mutual friends, but our one-on-one relationship is over."You should try to be civil.You don't have to harbor resentment if you eliminate someone's presence in your life.Re resenting someone or wishing ill against them can cause stress.I only wish you well, and I hope that you're happy with your life.I don't feel like I can maintain this friendship.
Step 6: "I"-statements can be used.
"I"-statements are statements that emphasize personal feeling over objective fact."I"-statements can help if you're having a difficult conversation.You're talking about how another person's actions make you feel.There are three parts to the "I"-statement.After you say "I feel...", you immediately state your feelings.You explain the actions that led to the emotion.You explain why you feel that way.Confronting someone without an "I"-statement can make them hostile.You could say, "We can't be friends anymore because you're a drain on me."Even though you know I have been through a lot, you never ask me how I'm doing.Using an "I"-statement can help emphasize your feelings.It can make it feel more like a personal declaration.Say something like, "I feel drained when you complain about your own problems without asking how I'm doing because it makes me feel like our relationship is one-sided."
Step 7: Be firm.
If you want to get rid of someone in your life, they may resist.You may be asked for another chance, with promises to change.Be firm if you've decided to end this relationship.Keep repeating, "I'm sorry, but I've made up my mind."It's appropriate to ignore phone calls and texts after you tell the person the relationship is over.If a person keeps trying to contact you, consider blocking their number.You might want to block them on social media.
Step 8: Tell the truth about your feelings for the relationship.
Many people fall into bad relationships over and over again.If you're worried about who will win in your life, take some time to evaluate relationships.It can be difficult to accept a relationship that is toxic to the point of not being sustainable.Do you feel drained when you're around someone?Do you feel obligated to spend time with certain people, or do you want to?Do you think you'll ever get an amount of respect?Are you continually disappointed by someone's behavior or attitude?Answer the questions honestly.Don't make excuses like, "Well, I do feel tired when I'm around Marguerite, but she's been going through a lot lately."This is a sign that the relationship is not a good one.Everyone goes through bad times.Most people have the ability to care for someone else's needs.If someone is draining to be around and this has been going on for a long time, you may want to end the relationship.
Step 9: Evaluate how someone makes you feel.
A relationship can make you feel good about yourself.Everyone hurts someone else's feelings when they feel frustrated with another person.This may be a toxic relationship if someone makes you feel bad about yourself.After spending time with someone, try to record your feelings.Write down how you feel after having coffee with Marguerite.Do you feel exhausted?Are you going to look at what she said that upset you?This is probably not a good relationship.You should get rid of this person in your life.You may be affected by another person's drama.If your friend Marguerite is upset about her boyfriend, she may be unwilling to talk about anything else.It may get to the point where you don't want to be around her when she's upset, because you know it will result in endless complaining.
Step 10: If the relationship feels the same, consider it.
The relationship should be fairly equal.You should support each other's emotional needs.One person in a toxic relationship may think his or her needs are important.Don't make excuses for the other person and be honest with yourself.Remember the last time you needed help.Did this person reach out to you?Did he or she ask how you were?Was this person avoiding you until your neediness passed over?One person may be competitive in a toxic relationship.You can bring up a stress issue with your partner."At least you have someone," Marguerite may say.I've been single for a year.You may be able to comfort her after she launches into a rant about her issues.There is an unbalanced balance.This person is placing her own emotional needs on a higher level than yours, and using your problems as a way to fit in.
Step 11: Look for signs of emotional manipulation.
Toxic relationships can be ripe with emotional manipulation.Toxic relationships can be identified by signs of emotional manipulation.If you're being manipulated, you may be afraid to speak up.The person may accuse you of being hypersensitivity.A person may not take "No" for an answer.If you say you can't attend an event because of work, a person may ask a lot of follow up questions, pushing you to quit.This person may control you.You feel like you have to walk on eggshells around this person to avoid an upset.You can ignore your own needs to cater to the other person and go along with the situation.
Step 12: See if there are any positives in the relationship.
Identifying the perks of toxic relationships can be helpful.There are many reasons why people are drawn to the wrong person.You should try to figure out what you get out of the relationship.You need to work on deeper issues to stop toxic relationships.It is possible that you are drawn to a type of personality due to poor relationships.Say your mother was distant and cold.As you seek for an approval that you never received, you may unconsciously seek out people similar to your mother.You may be drawn to toxic relationships due to issues with self-esteem.If you worry about your life being a mess, you may subconsciously be drawn to people with similar problems.Emotionally unhealthy people can make you feel needed even when you have doubts about your own abilities.
Step 13: Allow yourself time to grieve.
You will need time to grieve when you've removed someone from your life.The ending of a relationship can bring about a feeling of loss.Give yourself time to come to terms with the loss.It is helpful to write a goodbye letter.The letter won't be read or sent, but it can be cathartic to write it.Pretend you're writing to someone and state how you feel.You can get out all the things you couldn't say when you ended the relationship.
Step 14: A ritual can be planned.
It's important to remember big events or changes.It's sad when a relationship ends.A ritual can help you symbolically mark the end of a relationship.You can throw away items that remind you of someone.It may feel silly, but many people find ritual helps bring them closure.
Step 15: You should surround yourself with people who are positive.
After removing the loser from your life, you should surround yourself with positive people.Look for friends who make you feel good.Pick people who make you feel good after you hang out.
Step 16: Don't feel guilt or shame.
It's possible that you feel guilty about ending a relationship.Try to keep your feelings of guilt to yourself.You should feel respected and have your needs met.People end relationships throughout the course of a lifetime.If someone's presence causes you stress, you don't have to feel bad about cutting ties.