It is difficult to get over an ex boyfriend.You could be preventing you from fully moving on and being open to experiencing love again.The first step in getting over a past relationship is to accept that your grief and feelings of sadness are normal.Gathering the strength to move forward can ensure that you find happiness again rather than letting your break up be all-consuming.
Step 1: Allow yourself to grieve.
Trying to block legitimate feelings or make short cuts around the grieving process will only prolong your heartache in the long run.They are bound to come back some day, only intensified by burying your emotions.If you focus on feeling every feeling and experiencing every heart pang, you'll be a stronger person in the long run.You cannot avoid the feelings of withdrawal from your ex.You have to be the healthiest version of you in order to let go.Every day can bring you closer to healing and happiness.Accept that you will be functioning at a less than optimal level for a little while and be kind to yourself.
Step 2: You should embrace your independence.
No one can make you content except for you.You can feel a sense of power if you know that your happiness is in your own hands.It is possible to look at the upside of being alone.You can make the decisions and not be defined by someone else.You can forge your own identity by exploring who you are now.You won't be let down or disappointed if you serve as your own support system.You should engage in activities that you wouldn't do with you.You should eat foods that he doesn't like, and watch movies that you will not see with him.
Step 3: Don't think about yourself.
Resist the urge to rush into another relationship because you are going to stand on your own two feet without your partner.You may come to understand the realities of your previous relationship if you do so.Use your brain instead of your heart to view the relationship.If he was the kind of boyfriend that you would want for your friends, ask.Would you choose this person as a partner if you had to do it all over again?The answer may make you think about the relationship in a different way.If the break up is fresh, don't feel pressured to make any decisions about the future of your relationship.It will be easier for you to focus on healing over the next few months.Remember that you broke up for a reason.It is likely that there were real issues in the relationship that were permanent, even though the pain you are experiencing is temporary.
Step 4: The water works.
You will feel better after a good cry.Emotional tears contain toxic biochemical byproducts, so ridding your body of them relieves stress and removes these substances.When you cry, you are reminded that you still have the ability to love and care for others.You can take a shower or walk to a secluded park if you want to do a good cry in private.
Step 5: It's important to exercise regularly.
Staying active will give you immediate relief from your pain because it stimulates brain chemicals and increases the growth of nerve cells.Valuable time with which to ruminate and think over your feelings will be gained.You can come to some conclusions this way.You will experience more energy to make it through the day and enjoy physical health.Taking charge of your mind and body will make you feel satisfied.If you join a group exercise activity, such as a spinning class or sports team, you can make new friends and form a support system.
Step 6: You should surround yourself with people who care for you.
Don't be afraid to share your feelings.Your support system can be more helpful if they understand what you are going through.You may find comfort in the fact that you can trust them instead of relying on your ex boyfriend.There are people who are going through the same thing you are.It is easier to share your feelings with other people.If there is no one in your life, you can reach out to a therapist or counselor.New friends.You may feel like you lost your network when you broke up with your boyfriend, because you didn't have as much time to form new bonds.You can interact with others who share the same interests if you take a class or volunteer.
Step 7: List the qualities that you're proudest of.
This will help you focus on the positives.You will notice that your strengths are more important than what someone else does or doesn't like about you.You will be able to uncover your true self once your viewpoint is no longer clouded by negative thoughts.He didn't appreciate you writing thoughtful poems because you were always proud of it.You should put this one at the top of your list.You can make a list of obstacles that you have overcome.You can do it in the present if you know how resilient you are.
Step 8: Write your goals down.
To focus on anything other than your break up and your ex, make a list of realistic steps and timelines.A sense of accomplishment will make you feel better about yourself.You will be less focused on the day-to-day if you work hard towards something for the future.Writing down your goals will make them seem real and make you more likely to hold yourself accountable.Your goals can be anything from working towards a promotion at your job to flossing your teeth everyday.The idea is to feel good about yourself.
Step 9: Help someone else.
You can shift your thoughts away from your break up if you focus on another person and act as their support system.Rechanneling the love and energy you put into your relationship is what it is.Others will be drawn to you and want to spend time with you, making you feel less lonely and rejected.Volunteer at a local soup kitchen or perform acts of kindness towards a friend who has experienced a death in the family.Showing kindness towards others has been shown to relieve symptoms of depression.People will be more likely to help you when you need it the most.
Step 10: Allow yourself to move on.
It may be hard to believe that you will find love again, but remember that unless you take risks, you won't reap any benefits.Learning from past mistakes is an important part of ending a relationship.Don't feel guilty if you put your feelings for your ex behind you.If someone catches your eye, flirt with them.You might be surprised at the number of people who interest you now that you are more open to meeting them.Ask your friends to join you on a girls night out where you can have fun and meet new people.
Step 11: A new reality that doesn't include your ex is created.
If you find friends that are toxic or hold you back, please purge them.You've always thought about it, but never actually done it.Travel to a foreign country, get a drastic haircut, or redo your living room.Forging new experiences without your ex will make you feel like a different person.You can make small changes such as where you shop for groceries or get your hair done.It is thought that you have created an entirely different life for yourself.Try to rediscover your passion for any hobbies or interests that you gave up on while you were with your ex.
Step 12: Don't focus on guilt.
If you feel that you made a mistake in the relationship, you should move on.You should not be hard on yourself for things you can't change.Try to remember what you did right, either in the relationship or outside of it.Imagine a time when you supported, loved and loyal to those around you.Who is behind the guilt that you are feeling?Do your friends want you to get back together with your ex?Determining which feelings are someone else's and which are your own is important for figuring out if the guilt is justified.
Step 13: You should not avoid places that remind you of your ex.
It's a good idea to still eat at your favorite restaurant if you frequented it together.To create new memories, make reservations to go with friends.You can't let your sadness dictate your actions.If you shared a mutual friend with your ex who you still care about, try not to let that change the nature of the friendship.
Step 14: When you meet someone new, don't allow the negative vibes to get in the way.
It is important to remember that starting a new relationship does not mean it will end the same way as your last one did.Concentrating on how you were treated will make you feel bad.You could miss out on a chance to meet someone amazing if you hold onto these feelings.No two men are the same, so allow yourself to learn from your past mistakes.
Step 15: Expect different results if you keep doing the same thing.
If you notice a pattern in your relationships, consider how you can avoid it.Failure to change this habit will result in a similar outcome, whether it is being taken advantage of, or letting a negative side of your own personality take over.The reasons why you're drawn to this type of relationship should be addressed.Discuss the nature of your relationship with the people closest to you.They can help you evaluate what went wrong with your ex.
Step 16: There are no reasons to contact your former lover.
If your break up is fresh and you are still healing, you won't be able to have a friendship with one another.If you are still in contact, it will be hard to have an objective viewpoint on what went wrong.It may make it harder for you to accept the end of the relationship.If there is still dialogue between the two of you, it can be difficult to close the book.Acceptance of the end is unavoidable if there is a clean break.Changing your phone number and email address is a possibility if he is contacting you.If you remove him from your social media accounts, you won't have to think about him when you log in to your accounts.Most apps have ways of blocking people if you want to keep him.
Step 17: Do not use drugs or alcohol to escape from your pain.
If you rely on something as destructive as these numbing agents, you will be further behind in the long run.If you use drugs and alcohol, you will block your feelings and put off the grieving process.There is a chance you could develop an addiction.It is possible that you could drive friends away with this behavior.